The Eldritch Trials

Chapter 14: Kiss of the Necromancer

Mac

Cold rushes through me, immense, terrible cold. And I can see purple and blue lights glowing around us as Jade kisses me.
And the memories flood back.
It's awful, like a million movies going on in my head at once. Every memory I ever obtained is just there, glowing, reflecting through my mind. I don't know my own name anymore; I have a dozen. I don't know why we're here. I've been here before.
But I do know her. Occasionally him. Them. Her. This person whose mouth is still locked with mine as my life rushes back.
Free of the curse.
For the first time in years I breath easily. And I feel so, so strong again.
"Hey," she whispers, face pressed against mine, sweaty and tired. The spell is over, and I'm very much alive again.
"Hey you," I say, grinning, enjoying these last two seconds of just having her pressed against me. As I recall we're doing things. But god it's good to be back.
I hear goblins. Yeah, we've got to be doing things.
Gale, Shane, and Alec, are all locked in a fight with the goblins, trying to protect the two of us.
Jade slips in my arms, weak from performing my kiss. She'll recover, but it'll take a minute. That's fine. I'm fine now.
I stand up, drawing my dagger as an amplifier and cutting my palm with my ring. I smash the ring into the ground, drawing a spell to send bolts of magic through my various family members and Jade.
Gale actually staggers and Alec whirls around, nearly getting hit by a curse to realize I'm the one who just cast enough magic for a dozen spells their way.
"Questions later," I say, casting a force field to send three goblins away from Jade who needs another minute at least.
"If you die again I'm not bringing you back immediately I'll wait like a week you dumb—," Jade says. I kiss her to shut her up before casting again, this time a ball of light so that we can all see what we're doing. I hate the dark.
The others don't have the strength to argue. We cast in tandem, me supplying them with spells because they are weary. Jade leaps back in and does the same, recovering herself quickly and fighting back to back with me. We immediately fall into sync with the other. I can't even name the fights we've had like this but we're easy and practiced, throwing the other spells and flowing with the other's movements to defend.
The other three are far less used to fighting together but Shane's used to defending useless people so that works for his exhausted brother and nearly useless son. That's not Gale's fault, but he's not had a great day and he's been casting for probably hours now at this point he's hardly used to it.
I myself am sore and weary by the time we get rid of the goblins. Coming back to life isn't strictly fun and I haven't had a great day either. I've got stamina, but still. Jade looks dead on her feet, but not ready to admit it.
Shane has a very appropriate reaction to my newfound strength and me casting a couple spells that haven't been seen in about fifty years, "What the hell?"
"Priorities, let's get out of here and regroup. We're all shot and we haven't got the amplifier. I take it Angel got away while I was dying?" I ask.
"Yes, he released the goblins," Gale supplies.
"Fabulous, we'll catch him later," I say, swaying where I stand. I spit blood onto the floor, "Everyone for continuing the heartwarming argument someplace we can eat? And letting respective mothers know we're alive?"
"Yes, let's just go," Alec sighs, staggering as well.
So, what I meant was like, a diner and call people and tell them we're alive while I get fed. What Shane heard was, 'take two potential son figures by the back of the neck and march them all the way across the city to the mother of one of them, I guess the Necromancer can come to, and toss brother over wall of his awesome house so he can go confess some things to his wife' because that's what we do. I'm too exhausted and my head is spinning too much for me to argue. Instead I just loop an arm over Jade's shoulders and she leans into my chest while we limp steadily home.
This isn't triumphantly by any means, we stand on the subway like this. Covered in mud and blood, most of us angry for different reasons, refusing to speak to each other since we can't without arguing.  Even Jade shuts up for once, it's unnerving.
We make it back to my mother's flat. It's nearly dawn.
Shane kicks the door and then basically shoves Gale and I in by the backs of our coats. Like we'll wander off like we've both nearly done five times since the subway station. We were only looking for food.
My mother grabs me by the jacket, she's clearly been crying. Oh damn, of course the spell.
"Oh, sorry, you thought I'd died? Well, I mean kind of. I'm not currently dead—," is not comforting apparently because she basically hits me while hugging me and crying.  
"We need to talk," Shane says, still holding Gale and I by the back of our coats. I've never heard him so angry, let alone with her.
"Yes," my mother says, wiping her face with one hand, "We do."
"You're my real mother?" Gale asks, quietly. Shane lets go of us both really hesitantly like he thinks we'll still walk away or get lost.
"I gave birth to you, yes," she says, quietly, looking at me, "How much—,"
"Oh, we don't know anything," Shane says, his voice poisonous, as he gestures between himself and Gale.
"I had to tell them our biological relationship, for magic related bullshit reasons we're skipping, but will circle back to. Very quickly, did not go well," I shrug, "Again I apologize for not telling either of you before."
"Care to explain?" Shane asks, gesturing at each of us.
"Okay um—what do you know so far?" My mother asks, sighing quickly.
"Nothing! At all! I understand nothing so to be safe I am parenting both of them, now what the hell?" Shane asks, folding his arms, anger burning his eyes as he looks at her.
I shift and I feel Jade's hand on my shoulder, to steady me. I reach over and take it, automatically kissing her fingers and holding the hand.
My highly distractible family sees that  and gets sidetracked.
"What the hell is going on here?" Shane asks, pointing between us.
"Oh um—I have memories of my past lives now—yay—,"
"You took the kiss of the Necromancer," my mom looks between me and Jade.
"Yeah— yay —couldn't be helped I was dying—anyway, we knew each other in a past life, really not significant to what's going on let's do this first," I say, quickly, as Jade removes her hand and slinks to a corner to sulk. She's like a cat she'll be cross for hours she doesn't get to hold my hand.
"Feels like you're skipping something significant, but I'm gonna ignore that. For now, he's right back to this—I think it's high time somebody told me—and Gale what is going on, coherently, before I stab somebody mostly my brother, like I want to, because all I got from what he said is I should go kill my brother," Shane says.
"Yes, he's our son," she motions to Gale, obvious pain in her face.
"So how'd my fuckhead brother end up with him?" Shane growls.
"I figured out I was pregnant well after you'd been declared missing. I quit working for your brother immediately I couldn't curse break while I was pregnant. I didn't tell them why I left," she says, "I kept working at the hospital as long as I could but once they figured out I was pregnant they laid me off as well. I couldn't get work. I had a little money saved up but not much, and my parents said I couldn't move back home not having a warlock's child when I wasn't married. I was just going to keep the flat as long as I could, go to a shelter. I didn't know. I was panicking. And um—your brother showed up one day. With an offer."
She looks at Gale tears in her eyes, then at me.
"Give my baby up to them, they get to raise a healthy child. And when their child died at birth that child be—ascribed to me. By then we thought you were dead. Gale, I wanted you to have a good life, and it was with your father's family it was better than me trying to pick total strangers," she says, taking a breath, "I was trying to do what was best for you. I knew your mother would love you and she was a good woman. And I couldn't provide for you. I couldn't keep you."
"Then why did you keep him?" Gale asks, pointing at me.
"I didn't plan on it. He —he was dying when they gave him to me. I wasn't going to let him die—it was a miracle the cures worked—,"
"That's because he has my magic, I handled his reincarnation; he was stronger stuff than any other child that succumbed to the curse," Jade speaks up, "If it hadn't been him the baby would have died."
"That explains why my cures did something—um, yeah, I expected him to die in a week. Two. My landlord gave me a few extra months when he saw the sick baby—then you came back," she says, nodding to Shane.
"Right. Okay, following," Shane says, rubbing his face, "I'm not blaming you for giving the kid up. I'm blaming you and my brother for not bothering to fucking tell either of us!"
"So you could what? Go get in a fight with him? Shane, I had a dying three month old baby that I was attached to while in—suicidal depression from giving him up—no way in my brain was I going to risk losing either of you by telling you the truth—you'd have immediately fought your brother—and I saw him and his wife when they took Gale, they needed a child and they did love him as their own; your brother never would have let you take Gale back for Anita's sake and I could not have you get killed, or worse reveal to them Mac was alive and then they take him too," my mother says, tears running down her face.
"So you lied to us?" Shane asks, anger still burning his face.
"In the moment, I saw you you were half dead and in that moment I couldn't tell you! I knew if I did then hell would break loose! And what if something happened—to either of them? My magic was keeping Mac alive then, to tell you would have been to choose Gale over Mac's life. And I love them both. I couldn't choose," she says, tears running down her face.
I walk over and hug her, tightly now, my breath steady and even and her able to breath on her own, for the first time.
"We're not saying mistakes weren't made—and Gale yes you deserved to know you were adopted. However, you can see we had limited choices. The impoverished—how old were you nineteen?"Jade asks, stepping forward.
"I was twenty one," my mother says, quietly.
"Okay, the impoverished twenty year old who was coerced into giving up her own child and was awake all hours caring for a sick infant is not the person responsible for making the sound decisions! Yes, you were both lied to, by multiple people. It wasn't Mac's secret—,"
"It was mine!" Gale cries, "It is my secret!"
"Which is your parent's fault! Both of them. You can't ask her to give up the baby she was keeping alive, who she took home, not in that state of mind she had no idea what those people would do, she had no idea what you would do— were you married to her? Were you any help at all except showing up half dead? I think no. Because of her, both children are alive. I'm not saying she made the best decision there was I'm saying she handled the situation as best she could because she was trying to protect all of you despite being in a physical and mental hell," Jade spits.
"Okay, yeah—it's been sixteen fucking years since then, it never—ah, was going to come up?" Shane asks.
"I had no idea how long he'd live, what you wanted me to tell you then? So you could turn him over to your brother for a quest that would kill him?" My mother asks, "I couldn't do that. They knew damn well Gale couldn't use the amplifier I had to trust they would protect him, I knew his mother would, while I knew for a fact if they got Mac back they would use him. One more time, I will not choose between their lives. I cannot."
"One more time, she is not the party at fault here. There are two people who chose to lie to you for sixteen years and two people who made the decision sixteen years ago. One, a terrified, twenty year old woman with no job, no family, unmarried, sick from child bearing, who gave birth to one child, only to nurse another round the clock with no sleep, still no job, still no family, still no man to show for it. Two. A perfectly healthy, adult male in his mid forties, who upon discovering he was impotent, found his little brother's pregnant mistress and decided to coerce her into giving up the kid to raise as his own. Who do you think we should blame in this scenario?" Jade has advanced on Shane who actually took a step back at this tirade.
"They both lied to me," he says, looking at Gale, then at me.
"None of this is Mac's fault," my mother says, "I told him to tell no one, he was a child. I told him the truth because it concerned him and his health. So that he could decide if he wanted to meet his biological parents."
"Precisely, she told the child she was raising and was honest about his history and the circumstances of his birth. I admit you should have known the location of your son, but the guilt for that heavily rests on your brother who A) pretty quickly found out you weren't dead B) when he thought you were dead chose to lie to your child and raise him as his own and turn the child's mother out on the street, C) after you came back never elected to bring in the incident up—think about it. He didn't know Mac was alive. For all he knew you never spoke to this poor woman again, he stole your child, and he had every ability to tell you that they'd adopted your son while you were gone, and he chose not to," Jade says.
"Nobody stole. I did give you up, I agreed, so you'd have a better life," my mother says, to Gale.
"Ahh, we're going to discuss your agency in that situation when you were in dire straits and actually from what I can tell did want to raise your child, they absolutely could have offered to feed and house you and the child out of the share of Shane's estate, since he was supposedly dead," Jade says, shrugging.
"See? That—that is why I didn't want to go back, I didn't like them, I liked my mom, and you had yours, so it was kind of over," I say.
"So you can be cross at her but you don't get to blame her. If you wanted to have your kid that badly you should have married her before you got her pregnant," Jade says, folding her arms, "You didn't. You made no allowances for her or your child. None of that was malicious, but neither was what she did to protect both of them. She tried to give your son the best life he had nothing from you then."
"You could have told me," Shane says, quietly, looking past Jade at my mother.
"I couldn't take the chance," My mother says, taking a breath.
He looks up at me, he hasn't addressed me this whole time, "Mac— I."
"We're cool," I say, holding up my hands, "I get it. Just don't be mad at my mom. Our mom."
Shane looks at Jade, "Why are you here?"
"Oh I'm here for him," she says, poking my arm, "And also as general legal council as the only other female present. I have had children in past lives. Adopted, and biological. I know how a mother feels, and my circumstances were much more ideal as were my child's health."
I nod. Brief, soft memories. Cradling an infant against my bare chest, then slowly shifting the child to its mother's arms. Kissing her cheek as she holds the child to her own bare skin. I shake my head. Too much for my brain right now. I'm content they happened. I'll delve into it later. If it, it being the child, were significant right now Jade would tell me. We have total reincarnation, a child might not. Ergo, the child could have lived a long and normal life and we're just, going on.  All something I can discover later. Jade's had plenty of time to browse through her memories, I've had a few hours. Jade squeezes my arm as if sensing my realization that the child she mentioned is of course ours.
"We need to go to —Anita, and your brother. They deserve to know you are both all right, Anita has been worried, for you both, she loves you both as well," my mother says.
"Oh, she knows about me?" I ask.
"I told her when you both ran off to complete the trials, knowing she'd be terrified as Gale couldn't work the amplifier on his own," my mother says.
"Fair," I shrug.
"I don't want to go talk to them. You're technically my parents. They kidnapped me. I'm staying here," Gale says, sitting down on the couch and folding his arms. "I like you better."
Yeah, he revises that opinion quickly when our mom goes through his bag.
Jade concedes it's perhaps best not to go immediately and to let feelings settle (she said this staring directly at Shane). And she and my mother both agreed all of our injuries should be seen to before we traipse across town to have another emotional discussion for hours on end.
Gale isn't bad at witchcraft, so after a moment he quietly offered to help our mother with poultices for our injuries. Meanwhile, Jade and I set about cleansing the amplifiers we used and I get more food to put in our bags. We're realists, this is far from over and weapons need to be ready. This is merely a pause what with Angel on the loose.
Anyway, since I'm emptying bags of used weapons and things, that's how we wind up going through Gale's bag and finding out he has half a pharmacy in there.
"Wait, that's mine!" He says, as Shane and our mother very disappointedly look at the various prescription bottles.
"They have other people's names on them," Shane says, holding one up.
"These are all anti-depressants," my mother says, she looks up at me and Jade who look back at Gale.
"He swore me to secrecy," I say.
"He didn't swear me to secrecy—he thinks he has depression so he went to a doctor. It did not go well," Jade says.
"No. The guy was an idiot. So I figured I could take some of those and see if it helped. I took like—those this morning," he points at one of the bottles, "I felt sick for a bit."
"You would—these doses aren't for your weight or height—or age," our mother, an actual nurse.
"Oh, well I figured it might be close," Gale withers.
"No, it is not," our mother says, "These have to be prescribed for a reason."
"Well, I'm not going back to a doctor, not right now anyway, it was awful I'm not being locked up I will kill myself if I have to do that," Gale says, resolutely. And it's the resolve that scares me. The defiant flash in his eyes, like killing himself would be a relief.
"For the present, take these," my mother picks one of the bottles and shoves the rest aside, "Take one in the morning, one at night, but on the condition that someone, one of us I don't care who, is around you all right? And if you feel worse not better you immediately tell someone and we let you get it out of your system?"
"Really?" Gale asks, hopefully.
"Do you have hallucinations, or hear voices, or have highs and lows, or anything other than thoughts of hopelessness?" She asks, gently.
He shakes his head no, quietly, "Just that I want to kill myself."
"Okay, these are very good for helping with suicidal ideation, you need to tell someone if you feel worse and immediately quit taking them if you do, all right?" She asks, pushing the bottle over to him, "Do I need to hold this and give them to you one at a time?"
"No I can take it," he says.
"If you try to OD on these you will just feel very terrible, got it? Just take them twice a day, and we will see, this is very illegal and in future you will need to see a doctor but I realize that the current situation is not good right now if you were already feeling bad, okay?" She asks.
He nods, weakly, tears in his eyes. I move to comfort him then think better of it. He doesn't want to talk to me either right now.

Nel

He's suicidal? My baby is suicidal? Why? Why would you want to hurt yourself, precious? Precious boy, I love you so much. I whisper goodnight to you every single night. I do spells for you each full moon for your health and happiness.
I know logically that depression and mental illness have no cause and can strike anyone. But that isn't stopping me from blaming myself.
Shane sweeps the rest of the stolen pills into a trash bag, along with crushed food that Mac dumped out of his bag.  He winces a little, and I can see blood running down his arm.
"Let me see," I sigh, holding out a hand.
"I'm fine," he says, not looking at me.
"I know I can't make things right—," I sigh.
"No. You can't," he says, flatly.
"At least you got to see our son," I say, quietly.
"Yeah, but I didn't know he was my son. I don't blame you for giving him up. I get—I get that. But I do blame you for not telling me. Not right away fine, I was hurt, whatever. But in the past sixteen years I think you could have told me," he sighs.
"I could have. But doing that meant losing Mac and I couldn't do that either," I say, handing him a dressing for his arm. He takes it, rough hand brushing mine for just a moment. He doesn't look at me though.
"You should have told me," he says, flatly, looking up at the kids.
Gale is sitting on the sofa with his face in his hands. Mac sat next to him, not touching, not saying anything. Jade goes over to sit on the ottoman across from Mac. He automatically slides his foot so that it's laced with hers. She smiles a little but says nothing.
"What happened there?" I ask.
"You tell me," he grunts.
"Don't do this," I sigh.
"Don't do what? Act like you've lied to me for the past sixteen years?" He growls, "You tell me, Nel. I'm the one who doesn't know anything that's going on here apparently. No wonder your scrying didn't turn up past lives—that's not the kid you were carrying was it? Anything else I should know?"
"No," I say, fighting to keep the hurt from my voice, "Yes, I suspect Mac has past lives I don't know how many as you just said I have no idea who I couldn't contact the spirit that took him because of course I was not pregnant with him. I had Gale, who yes, has no past lives. I found out nothing about him. So no I don't know why he has depression."
"Cause his whole fucking family lies to him?" Shane grunts.
I can't answer that. I look away, tears on my face. He's probably right. It is our fault. Of course it is.
"The girl did the kiss of the Necromancer on Mac, to save his life we'll—yeah we're circling back to what exactly happened, but yeah, I don't know. They were attached before but it's more so now. He remembers her. She's a very powerful Necromancer so that's not good," Shane concedes, almost nicely.
"The dagger was seven hundred years old you said," I say.
"Correct. And that Necromancer is probably at least a thousand. She handled spells like a two hundred year old mage," Shane says, "There's something different now he's—he's not sixteen anymore. He doesn't act it. He's not telling us what his memories are. I asked twice he's brushed it off. So he knows something."
"Okay," I sigh. I have no idea what to do about that. I clearly have no idea what to do about anything.