4. Trent Phoebe{ManxMan}

•CHAPTER 9

The feeling of his finger on my cheek, the sparks were evidently there, dim and spreading through my face, I shivered St the feeling of it. I was shocked at how much I wanted to continue feeling them, how much closer I wanted him to be.

I realised how instinctual I was on our first meeting, the excitement at finding him. Knowing that I too would be loved and cherished like all the people in my life were.

In this moment though, I realised how hard that would be because I had remembered them, I had wondered about them since coming into this house.

I caught it, his excitement, it was potent and slowly weaving through his warm and welcoming scent. He was aroused by me, by my inexperience. I felt the jolt too, the though of him, only him and I in this bubble of warmth and love and intimacy, it turned me on too, I had to step back as I began fighting against my instinct to breed and my rational mind.

"So, we're supposed to have sex?" He smirked at me, his one hand going into his pocket.

"Well, I had hoped, however, it's not a necessity." He chuckled seeing my face and I cursed myself mentally for being so obvious at my shock at his response. "You must think I'm an asshole."

"No!" I stepped closer to him, taking his wrist lightly. "I just," I glanced down at his pants, the bulge was noticeable and from the room probably still left he was only semi hard. "I just assumed, I guess."

"Shall we talk this through dinner?" He asked, brows raised in question. "The food is getting colder by the second."

I nodded, my eyes fixed on his warm dark ones. We sat down and I swallowed. "I feel like I ruined the mood." I admitted and he shook the head.

"I feel you added to it." He grinned at me. We ate and yes, the food had cooled down significantly, but it was bearable. "You're rather straightforward, to be honest."

I flushed. "I prefer when things are clear. I'm sorry."

"I like that, don't apologize for wanting to have an understanding on the circumstances." He smiled at me. His scent was intoxicating, the more I looked at him, and he more I felt he was further away on the other side of the table. His arousal was still mingled with his calming scent and it was driving me crazy with want.

I had to pinch my thighs.

"Not a lot of people appreciate that."

"I hope you know, only a coward hates being forced to own up to their intention."

I bit my lip and felt myself become so shy. He felt so dominant, so very in control that I barely had a grasp on how to act. "And what are your intentions?"

"I want to fuck you." I blinked completely not caught off guard and he smiled. "I also want to dine with you when I can, I'm curious about you, Trent." He was leaning forward, watching me as his chin rested on his hands.

"All of that, in secret." I stated and he tilted his head.

"Does that mean you decline?" I looked away from him to a portrait of himself hanging over a fireplace and wondered as I was able to think straight. I had decided, his gaze was bad news, it made my thoughts bad and made it hard to think clearly.

"I don't like the idea of secrets." He took in a breath and I looked over to see him nodding as he looked at his plate. "While I understand why, I don't like that."

His eyes looked over at me then and I looked at the candle. "No man in town, no, in the world would dare admit how they prefer the company of man and live to tell about it." I looked over at him, his face calm and stern. "We all want to be claimed, Trent, to be free to do as we please," he stood then. "The consequences to that though, they are not worth it."

I wondered what consequences they had but didn't ask. Instead I sighed before he was in front of me, his hand outstretched. I took it and he pulled me to him.

His scent wrapped around me like a blanket and I was hooked. His eyes were a day dream and I swallowed. He was so close to me, so very close that we breathed the same exact air, we exchanged it actually.

"You are beautiful," he hand held mind tightly, his other reaching up to brush my hair. "I wanna know what your face does when I lick you," his voice was low and husky and I held my breathe, now flooded with the images he painted. "I want to know what sound you make," his finger trailed the side of my face to my lips which he tapped, "when I touch you, you can imagine, how curious I am."

My heart leaped and crashed, my stomach was a fluttering mess and I wondered. "Other than my naked flesh and my desperate yells, what about me has you curious?" He blinked, looking through me, his eyes searching as he furrowed his brows.

I swallowed at the hollow feeling burrying itself in me. He opened his mouth and closed it and I smiled. "I think I should go, Demetri, but do find me, when you know the answer."

I pulled out of his grasp, realising just how difficult it was. I understand with that feeling why most mates were constantly wrapped around one another, had just never missed a moment to be touching in some way. The sparks dimmed with his lack of touch and I swallowed the lump in my throat as I realised my brother would probably call me a prude at this moment. I chuckled to myself as my eyes burned realising how hurt I was and how desperate I was to go home.

Before anything went further, before my heart got trapped in a cage.

Elijah was asleep when I got back, Demetri having allowed me use of his carriage. As I dressed in the clothing my dad gave me and watched him sleep I thought to his life now, was this why I found him alone? Other than wanting to avoid casters, was this why he didn't seem to bother himself with people? Because the life they wanted everyone to live didn't match his? Or because at the end of the day everyone was just pretending to be happy, to be cool when they weren't.

I thought of Demetri until I fell asleep. The man was beautiful and he made me feel things I had always wondered about and for a moment I had been hopeful, but I had to realise that at the end of the day, I didn't belong here, this wasn't my time and getting attached wouldn't help me.

For his birthday, I realised my father was just sad. I woke up ready to surprise him with something I had been working on without him knowing. I took shop class in school and had a knack for making things. I had made this ring from scratch that I thought he would like, it wasn't much, just a band really with an engraved inside. It was the best I could do under short notice and being as broke as I currently was.

He cried. Elijah was a shaking mess as he held it in between his fingers. "It's not much," I told him feeling panicked. "I made it from what I could find an-"

Suddenly his arms were around my neck and he was sobbing into my neck. "This is the first present I've ever recieved my whole life."

That fact had my own eyes watering as I held my father close to me, broken from his youth and having to feel so overwhelmed in such a small insignificant moment.

I revelled in the warmth of his arms and held him as though he would disappear tomorrow.

A\N
Written: 5 April 2022