lost in the suspension of our past mistakes (Dream SMP)

1- an old, familiar train

yo! this is HEAVILY inspired by @ghostlytart's AU, so go check em out!! https://twitter.com/ghostlytart

the cover is literally just a cropped screenshot of the ycgma cover cause i totally blanked for cover ideas

cw for some blood, but that's really all

--

His eyes were shut, his head leaned against the cold, stone wall, his hands open and palms facing upwards. Hardly a breeze blew by, gravity unbeknownst to his stray hairs, lips left chapped and slightly parted.

Nothing moved. Not anymore. After years, the tears had finally stopped, welcoming a sense of sheer emptiness and quiet.

And, most consequentially... Ghostbur was alone. Alone, forever locked within a world he had no control of – limbo. Was it even his limbo? It had to be, if he and Alivebur were truly the same person... but Ghostbur had stopped worrying about this a long time ago.

Around him, he had painted each tally mark with his blue, as there were already preexisting marks carved into the walls upon his untimely arrival. But he'd stopped keeping track of the days that passed, as well. No, he didn't want to know how long he'd been here.

Ghostbur hadn't moved in years, perhaps decades. Could it have been centuries...? He didn't know.

He didn't want to know a single thing. The train station's stifling air was suffocating as it entered his incorporeal lungs, and the flashes of the dot matrix above made his eyes ache.

For the first time in years, Ghostbur shifted a bit, tilting his head a little – he winced as his stiff muscles protested against such a small motion.

Did they remember him? Did they even care that he was gone?

These thoughts weren't new. They'd been circulating throughout his brain ever since he'd seen that twisted smile in his final moments, clamoring for attention and recognition from his nervous system.

But it didn't matter anymore – it didn't. Ghostbur had made peace with the fact that he'd never leave this nightmare.

But even so, he still missed Tommy. Was he okay? What if Alivebur hurt him? Undoubtedly, if Alivebur put Tommy into any sort of danger, Ghostbur would be responsible for it, as well. After all, they were the same person... weren't they?

For the first time in years, slow, shrill whine echoed through the platform. Ghostbur paid it no mind – this wasn't the first time his imagination had messed with his head, fueling him with a false hope that was soon to dwindle.

No, he didn't miss only Tommy. He missed Tubbo, he missed Phil, he missed Quackity and Ranboo and Fundy. He missed everyone.

Something hit the pavement. Something heavy slowly dragged itself over the tracks, rattling the iron rails.

For the first time in years, Ghostbur opened his eyes.

And for the first time in years, he felt something.

He recognized the man who had crumbled to the ground, holding himself up on his hands as he stared at the ground, shoulders shaking.

"Al–" Ghostbur began, but paused, wincing as his hoarse voice cracked. "Alivebur?"

Even though Ghostbur's words received no acknowledgement, he didn't need confirmation. All he needed to see was the white streak in his counterpart's hair, and Ghostbur's suspicions were confirmed without a second thought.

Why was Alivebur... here, though? Ghostbur was tempted to approach the man, but he hadn't moved his legs in... well, far too long. He doubted he could make it three steps, better less all the way across the platform.