Being a Queen Bee

Chapter 10: My Life Is the Worst

Ever since my cancellation for playing the role of Cady, my life is literally the worst. I have zero friends, my grades are dropping, and I don't know who I am anymore. Everything is just messed up, and how I'll fix it, I'll never know. When I walk the halls of the performing arts, everyone stares at me like they're disappointed, like they never expected this from me. Honestly, I thought I would never go this far either. People get disgusted looks on their faces when I so much as smile, let alone grin. I see Ace in class, and he always turns away, seemingly hurt. Finally, one day I just can't take it anymore, and I run right out of school, shaking with fear and desperation. I feel like I can't please anyone, and I'm trying to make everyone feel happy, but I'm not really happy myself. I'm the prettiest one in the entire school, and just like all the nerds and loners in our school, I was just as messed up as them. I was a nobody, somebody that I thought I'd never be. I felt just like that nerd Chanel that everyone picked on in 7th grade. And the feeling was absolutely horrid. One day, I woke up feeling like I had the entire city of Los Angeles on my shoulders. I put on anything, and just went to school as I was. When I got there, someone grabbed me, hoisted me up on their shoulders, and hauled me to some random room. I fought that person when he finally put me down, making sure to punch him extra hard in the chest. "For someone who looks so delicate, you sure can fight.", he groaned. "It's a gift.", I replied sarcastically. When he looked up, I saw that it was Ace. "What do you want?", I questioned. "Are you happy that I'm the nerd you want me to be, that loner that you begged me to take the role on?" "No, of course not.", he retorted. "I'm just glad that you finally get to know what it's like to be a nobody." "What?", I hissed. "For four years, all you've been doing is tearing everybody down to build yourself up, and it's got to stop. I see some of these kids crying and holding back tears so as not to let everybody think that they're soft. The other day I heard that someone committed suicide just because someone else teased them for having FRECKLES.", Ace snapped. "I don't know what you're talking about.", I protested. "Yes, you do.", he insisted. "Take a good look around, and tell me what you see. That's when I realized that this wasn't just any old room. This room was unknown, and it was filled to the brim with mirrors. All kinds of mirrors, but mirrors everywhere. And they all reflected on Ace and I. Ace dragged me to a mirror, and forced me to look at myself, and tell him what I saw. "No!", I screamed. "You look at yourself every other day, and it seems to be your favorite thing to do, so just look at yourself!", he yelled back. He grabbed me around my waist, and turned my head forcefully to what was in front of me. That's when I saw this: A girl with a pretty face, and at first look, you would do anything to have her life. But underneath all that was a monster, with prying eyes, thinning hair, and a hurt soul. My eyes were puffy and dangerous-looking, my face weary and harsh, my life a mess. I saw that the whole me, was the equivalent, of a broken mirror. All this time, I thought was hurting other people, but actually, I was bringing myself down. I wasn't perfect like everyone knew me to be. This time when I looked in the mirror, my reflection actually revealed me to what's going on inside. I hated it. I wasn't all that I thought I was cut out to be. I thought I'd gotten rid of my 7th grade nerdy self, but in reality, she never left. I turned around, and hugged Ace with all my might. "Thank you.", I whispered gratefully. "You're welcome.", he murmured back. Ace helped me realize that I wasn't perfect, and nobody is. He taught me to just love and treasure myself for who I was. I can't believe that it took a GUY to help me see that. I decided that I was fed up with all this nonsense. I was going to march right to that auditorium, and fulfill my role as Cady. So that's exactly what I did. When I did it, Mr. Act practically sprung twenty feet in the air and clicked his heels together. I was going to rock this role, and whatever Chanel starts, best to believe, I'm going to finish it.