Butterflies (l.s)

🦋18🦋

I wanna finish publishing this and my other Larry book b4 Pride Month is up. I've got the chapters done, just gotta like get my slightly perfectionist self to accept and post them hehe. Let's see how this goes cos I've gotta travel in a bit and m not sure how easy Internet will be there which means I've gotta get this done within the week for yall 💪🏾

Harry didn't know what he was doing. He'd only met Louis once and it really was none of his business. The shorter lad didn't even want him to come, for goodness sake. He took a step into his apartment anyway after knocking for about a minute with no response. Fear suddenly seized him when he remembered the last time he'd seen Louis and then he was pushing past the door, his voice forced into a whisper from fear when he tried to yell for him.

"Louis... Oh God, Lou, are you in here? Somewhere...? Preferably alive, I hope...?" He didn't hear a thing, not even a disappointed grunt for his shitty attempt at humour.

He quietly walked past the small living space with a few long strides and entered his bedroom. Louis was laying right there, staring at the ceiling. He wasn't crying even the slightest but the dullness of his gorgeous blue eyes eyes broke Harry's heart all the same. He slowly shut them, eyelashes fluttering open as he turned his head to look at Harry. The gentle giant flushed a bit, hanging awkwardly by the door as he waved.

"Umm... Hi."

"Hazz... You... You came. Fuck. You came." Harry thought Louis was pissed at him at first but the blue eyed man got up, swept past him and began to pace around, shoving his clothes and other items littering the floor into his wardrobe at a steady pace. Harry giggled a bit and that just made him groan all the more, picking up speed. After a while, his movements slowed to a stop. His shoulders slumped in spite of his will to keep on and he turned slowly to meet Harry's gaze again, all the energy he'd had gone.

"I did try to clean, at first. But then... Ya know... I couldn't bring myself to care, anymore. I didn't have the energy. Or willpower. So I just kinda lay here, hoping you were lying. And also kind of scared that you would actually die and then it would be my fault, you know? Not a very rational way to think but death has shown me anything can happen. Life makes no promises."

"Well... I'm here. Didn't die."

"Yeah, Hazz, I see that. I do have eyes, lad. The weird blue circles in there aren't just for charming the pants off men." With a small, fond smile, he moved close and reached his hand up to play with one of Harry's wild curls. The taller one held his breath, locking eyes with Louis who shook his head to himself the moment he caught on to the fact that they'd been having a staring match for much too long. He nudged his head towards the door, walking out and Harry followed him, absentmindedly mirroring his slouched posture on the couch.

"Yeah... Umm... So..."

"So?"

"Last time we met..."

"No."

"O-okay. Well, last time we talked-"

"Again. No."

"Lou, please. You... I don't want to push it. And I won't. You can open up to me at your own pace but you said that I shouldn't make you think I care about you. And I just want you to know that I do. Even if you don't need me in your life or want me in your life, I want you. I like talking with you. Being around you. You might want to chase me away and that's fine, I'd never want to make you uncomfortable but I really, really don't want you to?"

Louis didn't say a word. Harry felt his heart crack within him because of course, he'd overstepped. He had that problem with his exes. He was always too much, too all over the place, he was always expressing feelings that were much too strong without his control. But when he cared for someone, he cared deeply and fell fast and it was hard to hide that away. He was about to apologise but then Louis got on all fours, crawled over to him and rested his head on his chest, much like Harry had done in the hospital.