Dewhowl stood in the foul-smelling graveyard, the rising sun bathing his fur in a burnished red light. Like a fox made of flames, it chased out the blanket of the night, revealing the blazing sun that climbed above the horizon. He stood there silently, over a fresh grave. Skyjaw passed away in his sleep, while Dewhowl had left the den to report to Asphodelstar on both his and Slightcoat's condition. He was afraid this would happen, but he had prayed that Skyjaw would have been given another chance and live to see the light of day. However, he was not granted it.
He and Slightcoat had sat in vigil before the medicine cat took the body to the graveyard and buried the warrior, Slightcoat taking the hardest hit of all. After all, Skyjaw had been his friend since they could walk and talk, they had been through everything together. I wish that we could have been through this together too. Slightcoat had muttered during the vigil. He could feel the sorrow swallow the tom up like a river being filled by a violent storm, soaking deep into his emotions and stabbing needle-sharp tendrils into his heart.
He couldn't help but feel angry with himself. It boiled inside him like a rising tide, causing his body to tremble. What good was it to train for moons stacked upon moons to become a medicine cat when he couldn't save a single cat? Was he destined to be a cat that buried his clanmates instead of giving them a second chance, truly he could've done more? Were his paws meant to be on the path he had chosen? He was filled with doubt, has StarClan forsaken him all those moons ago? Was the path they laid out for him created of lies and deceit?
He closed his eyes, gritting his teeth. Why couldn't he do it? Had he not trained hard enough? Was he missing something? Didn't Morningmoth teach him well enough?
He caught himself, shame washing his pelt like blazing fire before he made any more accusations. Morningmoth was the most skilled medicine cat he's ever seen. She had to have taught him everything, she worked so gracefully like her paws were always guided by StarClan. He should be honored that he was able to train underneath such a talented she-cat.
He sniffled. He missed the former medicine cat, he wished she was still around to comfort him when he felt like a distinguished flame, to tell him that he was destined for something great. The hollow felt empty without her, her pale gold pelt was like a flame of hope on a desolate day.
And the smell of her fur was so soothing. He took a deep breath, the heavenly smell of lavender and mint flooding his nose and bathing his tongue. However, comfort turned to confusion as he took another, sharper sniff. He opened his eyes, for just a moment he thought he had gone blind, a white light bathing his vision before he could make out the shape of a fluffy, round-featured feline. Next to them was a muscular tom, their pelt shined bright and well. He blinked, his mouth agape. He recognized the striped, pale gold fur of the she-cat from anywhere, and the sleek white fur he had covered with soil. "Skyjaw, Morningmoth." He meowed their name, the two felines blinking softly at him in turn.
He was imagining things, rubbing his eyes. Maybe his sorrow was playing tricks on him. However when he opened his eyes, the two cats were still there, their pelts spangled with stars.
"Dewhowl." A deep rumble echoed deep within Morningmoth's chest, her deep voice bringing instant comfort. "It's good to see you again." Her eyes shone bright, even when she was faced with the end and laying on her deathbed.
"I feel like a new warrior again!" Skyjaw purred out of the blue, clearly happy to share the news with Dewhowl and earning a chuckle from Morningmoth. He jumped up and down, like a spry apprentice leaving the camp for the first time. The medicine cat silently wished his joy was contagious. "My bones don't ache anymore, and I can see more clearly now!" He looked around as if he could show that his vision was better.
Dewhowl smiled weakly before he was overcome with a wave of different emotions. He stared at Skyjaw before his shoulders slouched. "Skyjaw..." He began, the starry tom blinking at him with a smile. He didn't expect to see the warrior so soon after his death, he had to apologize, to make up for the tom's swift passing. At once, it began to fall out his mouth like a waterfall, unstoppable and quick. "I'm so sorry I couldn't save you. If I did something faster, you would've still been here, if I didn't leave your side then—"
"I don't blame you." Skyjaw's eyes swelled with warmth as he stopped the words from tumbling uncontrollably out of Dewhowl, placing a paw gingerly on his muzzle. "I know you did your best. You're one of the finest medicine cats I've met, it was just my time, and I'm feeling better too!"
"But you have seemed to have lost sight of yourself." Morningmoth chimed with a serious tone. It brought everyone's attention to her. "What have I told you since you've been apprenticed?"
"That I was talented...?" Dewhowl murmured, unsure where she was going.
"So why do you doubt yourself now?" Morningmoth's gaze softened. "Didn't you believe me?"
Dewhowl tore his gaze away, embarrassed and full of grief. "All this death, it was caused by me. I couldn't save any of them." He swept his tail in a gesture to the graveyard. He felt a stinging in his heart, what could he have done differently? Surely there was an alternate solution that would've saved the cats he lost. All his overthinking had led to sleepless nights and overwhelming days. He tried to stay collected, his clan needed him to stay cool and calm, but Morningmoth had a way of breaking the walls of the most stubborn of cats.
He still needed her guidance, she was taken far too soon. He couldn't function on his own, he still needed her help to run the Medicine Den. However, he was too ashamed to admit it.
"Death is unavoidable. Everything dies one day." Morningmoth meowed, taking a few steps forward to give the living medicine cat a motherly embrace. Her tongue lapped at his fur, it only felt like a flutter of a butterfly's wing against his fur, but he was grateful for the soothing touch nonetheless. "You will never be able to save every cat that walks into your den, some may never walk out." She flicked a tail to Skyjaw as she stepped back, who beamed happily despite having died last night.
The comfort faded. "Too many have died," Dewhowl muttered under his breath.
"Dewhowl," Morningmoth brought his attention back to herself, her eyes stern. "You are destined for great things, you cannot wait for things to get better — you have to be the change. ShadowClan is in danger, you need to get Asphodelstar to see the fault in the isolation before you and your clan crumble. You determined the fate of ShadowClan."
"But how, what do I do?" Dewhowl gazed at her searchingly, hoping she'd give him some insight. She was wise, she would know what to do, wouldn't she? Yet, she only blinked warmly at him before her transparent form fluttered into the breeze. Skyjaw remained, his smile faltering.
"Dewhowl?" The dead tomcat asked meekly. "Can you tell Slightcoat that I'm alright?"
The medicine glanced at the tom. "Of course." Dewhowl nodded. Skyjaw demeanor brightened again and a grin stretched across his jaw in a wordless thanks before he joined Morningmoth, the medicine cat watching as his form twisted and tear until the last speaker had floated into the sky. With a deep breath, he started for camp with a bit of hesitation, filled with determination. He knew he had an important task set on his shoulders, and the fate of his livelihood was balanced on his success.
Morningmoth had placed her trust in him, though, and he couldn't let her down.
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SCAPEGOATS - a warrior cat fanfiction
Fanfictionscape·goat /ˈskāpˌɡōt/ noun a person who is blamed for the wrongdoings, mistakes, or faults of others, especially for reasons of expediency. It's happened again. ShadowClan is to be blamed for the misfortune of the five clans around the la...