Don't Fall In Love With Me

Chapter 6

1977- you're mine, completely.

I woke up the next morning tangled in bed sheets, it stunned me for a moment to where I was but then I'd realised quickly what had happened last night after I left Barry's house with Robin. We left together, Robin told everyone he was taking me back to my hotel so I didn't have to take a cab but in reality, he drove me back to his house so we could be alone together. The guilt suddenly took over me as it usually did when Robin and I slept together and the next thing that would happen is he would talk me out of the guilt then we'd be at it again.

Manipulation was a trait we both had. Robin knew how to manipulate me into having sex with him just as much as I knew how to manipulate him into continuously chasing me, I am in the wrong for everything I do when it comes too him, I don't play the victim. It only bothered me when I've convinced myself I was going to break the pattern and it never got broken. My life was never going to be normal if I let him keep on controlling me. I just lied there in his bed staring at the ceiling as my mind whirled on like usual it was just a continuous cycle he and I were on; The door began to slowly creak open which snapped me out of my thought train, Robin peaked his head in "You awake Stella?" he whispers "Unfortunately I am" I reply causing him to laugh. Sitting myself up pulling the sheets over me since I literally had nothing on he set down a cup of tea on the end table then made his way too the other side of the bed, he looked over at me and gave me his devilish smirk leaning in closer to me for a kiss, I stayed still for a moment as he was there with his lips puckered at me, I rolled my eyes then leant in obliging. 

Robin takes a sip of his tea as I do the same, then he looks to me again "So, how are you feeling?" he asks breaking the silence "Like a right slag if I'm honest" I reply "Stella!" he snaps "Don't talk like that" "Well I'm sleeping with a married man and with every attempt I give to stop you it ends up happening again" I say. That caused me to get up from the bed and grab my stuff, I wasn't hanging around any longer I needed to be alone for awhile and away from him "Where are you going?" Robin asks "I just need a break, Robin" I say "I can't keep doing this and being made to think that it's okay when your wife and kids are at home thinking nothing is going on." Robin didn't say anything after that, he left me alone for a bit to let me get ready to go. I love him, so much but I had to think about myself sometimes it couldn't always be about him and what he wants from me. I came out of the bathroom and he wasn't there so I assumed he was downstairs, as I made my way down there I saw him out in his back garden on the dock watching the boats go by I should probably just leave but I figured we should maybe talk about things. 

Robin turned as I made my way up the dock "I thought you'd be gone," he says "doesn't seem like your interested in me anymore" I sigh "It isn't that Robin" I reply "I can't live without you Stella I can't imagine my life, even my kids lives without you in it" Robin admits; Here was the sweet talking coming out and once again, it was working. He approaches me coming closer placing his arms around my waist now we were inches apart "I don't want you out of my life, Robin" I say looking up at him "We just need to stop the fooling around; if you want me come to me, don't string your wife along making it harder than it already is" Robin sighs placing his forehead on mine running his fingers through my hair "It's not that easy unfortunately my love" he whispers "I know but I can't wait forever" I say. 

The funny thing was though, I said I can't wait forever but I've already started.