From the Heart

- C H A P T E R 7 -

She had always been a negotiator. A real people pleaser. The glue within and between friend groups. She was the one that kept everyone on their feet, with their heads held high.

She was the glue between the New York group after the Maddek love triangle. When all of the sisters had chosen their sides. Everyone was basically bashing each other for their mistakes, when nobody but Mark, Addison and Abigail knew what happened. Not even Derek knew and she felt horrible for lying to him. So she forced Mark to go after them and fix Addie's mistake of not telling Derek. It took some time but they made up and became friends again. She had glued them back together.

But to do it herself, was a whole nother story. Abigail was a walking dysfunctional machine. She was full of defects. Physical and mental. She was not as she was supposed to be and there were some days that necked her.

This day had been exactly like that.

Her resident was on vacation which means she had a new one. Where her usual was kind and soft, this resident was anything but. He was exhausting and took every last bit of energy out of her.

Abigail had been working for eight straight hours without a single break. She hadn't gotten a chance to hydrate or fuel herself. He didn't let her. Told her that was for the weak. And she wasn't weak. She wasn't. So she was going to push through the pain, the hunger and the dizziness. She had to.

"Dr. Sloan." Oh no. It was her resident that came for her once again.

She turned around and put on the fakest smile she had in store. "Yes, Dr. Josephson?"

"Why aren't you working?"

"I am working, Dr. Josephson. I did all your post-ops, the consults, gave everyone his meds and inserted all the IV's. And now I'm on my way to check on 2381." She tried to sound confident, but honestly she probably sounded more annoyed. Which she was, but he didn't have to know that.

"Good, now get going."

"On my way, Dr. Josephson."

She was so done with this man. Abigail never imagined it, but she wanted Dr. Heal-With-The-Power-Of-Love back. She missed him. Why oh why was she always stuck with the incompetent. That was her luck. Yay!

This time yesterday, she did everything to get away from room 2381, but today she wanted nothing but to be in that room. Whatever she had to do to catch a break. To not be in the sight of Dr. Terror.

"You seem happy," he said as she dropped down on the loveseat with a big sigh.

"Incredibly," she grunted sarcastically.

He started laughing at her. But it sounded more like a low grumble or a thunderstorm in the distance. And as much as she didn't want it, she found it quite charming. No Abigail Everett Sloan, pull yourself together.

She didn't like her middle name. In fact, she hated it. Her brother had named her. Her first name was a misshapen amalgamation of her mother's name, who went by Alba Kelley Sloan. For her middle name, Mark thought it was a great idea to take his own and share it with her. So now, the two had the same middle and last name.

Mr. McKeen's laugh had faded. "Why are your hands purple?"

She looked down and saw that her fingers had indeed turned purple. That wasn't really something that was supposed to happen. "That's a very good question." It had happened before so she wasn't too worried and wove it off.

"You've had any pains or other problems, Mr. McKeen?" She stood up and just continued her work. She couldn't be in there for too long. Her resident would kill her.

"Lev," he corrected her.

"Excuse me?"

"My name is Lev."

"Well okay then Lev. Have you had any pains or other problems?"

"Not more than you've caused."

She raised her eyebrows. "Excuse me?"

"With not being here," he grinned.

Her eyebrows dropped. "Funny."

"I'd like to think so."

"Well if you don't have any other problems, I need to get going." She stood up quickly and left the room before the man could say anything to make her stay longer.

Today was not her day and she wished for it to be over soon, but her approaching resident told her something else. Like today could get any better.

"Dr. Sloan, we need to get going," he said. "We have a Laparoscopic Cholecystectomy and Dr. Webber waiting for us in OR 1."

Abigail had seen many of those before, but didn't complain about the much needed OR time. So, she followed Dr. Terror. Plus, it would be great spending a little extra time with Richard, even if that meant standing for another two hours in a room with her resident. She could handle it, and the lack of rest, food, and excess of stress she had experienced today. She could handle it all.

While she was scrubbing in she saw that the blue of her fingers had now traveled to the palms of her hands. Again, not really a good sign, but she decided to ignore it anyway. She wasn't going to be kept away from this surgery, even if she had seen dozens of it and would be able to perform many throughout her career. She needed this and nobody was going to take that away from her. So, she tried to hide the purple-ish blue from the other people in the room.

The moment she stepped into the OR all her problems disappeared like snow in the sun. Her fatigue was replaced by adrenaline. Her hunger was stilled. And her purple/blue hands were covered by gloves. It was like her troubles had faded and she was back being her normal Abigail.

Unfortunately it was just a temporary cover-up. An hour into the surgery, her legs started giving in and her hands started to tremble. She knew she couldn't handle it much longer, but she had to. She had no other choice than to push through. That was her only option.

But, only option or not, it didn't matter. Because her body decided to walk its own path and make its own decisions. A choice other than hers.
And there she lay on the ground. Completely unconscious with nothing left in her to fight. She was just a drained body laying on the cold floor in OR 1.

"Dr. Sloan, are you okay?" Richard asked her. She had heard it but couldn't answer. It was like she was stuck in her body.

"Abigail?!" Again she didn't answer him. She couldn't.

"Somebody page Dr. Shepherd and Dr. Sloan immediately."