Stronger Than Silver

I'm Fighting, Fighting, Fighting for You All.

(Trigger Warning: Bulimia, Anorexia, Abuse, Panic Attacks, Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt) 

The Slytherin prefect found himself so entangled in the tragic plights of those around him that the relentless episodes of filling and sicking somehow ceased fire. He was helping Narcissa, Severus, and a dozen others so often that he hardly had time to pay attention to himself. There was not enough time to feed off an entire kitchen or creep away to a nearby stall to pull the filth out of his body. So, Lucius stopped eating. Sleepless days would seep by without ingesting a morsel of food. The taste of certain foods became unknown to him. Water intake was scarce. His heart would erratically beat less, although its rhythm turned slow and dull. 

He felt weaker than before. His arms and legs feeble; his knees and hands shaky. Perhaps his body absorbed the energy from the food so quickly that even a minute it spent sitting in his stomach helped him not collapse, regardless of whether or not it would get hurled back up. The thought of his body draining the food of its calories with such haste unsettled him. What if some had transformed into fat? 

However, Lucius did not have as many intrusive thoughts or unwanted urges as before, now that his main priority was helping others. He was grateful for that. 

It looked like Narcissa was currently undergoing a period in her life where her mental health concerns seemed to worsen. Things were spiraling out of control, and Lucius could tell the girl was in perilous eating disorder territory. 

Insecurity that had clung to her since early teenagehood escalated when her sixth year began. Narcissa frequently made negative comments regarding her appearance and her weight. Bit by bit, she stopped talking about other topics and solely related every conversation to her body and how disgusting it was. Despite how Lucius reassured her that she was fine the way she was time and time again, the Slytherin girl would not back down from the rigorous expectations she set for herself. 

Especially considering what he had been going through for the past nine years, Lucius decided to keep a close eye on Narcissa to monitor what she was doing, and he found her eventually eating less and less. 

"Cissy, have you been eating?" Lucius asked her one Thursday during their free period. He cringed inwardly at how hypocritical he was. He had not touched a single morsel of food since three days ago, and now, he was asking Narcissa if she had eaten or not with a plan of getting her back to a healthy mindset. 

Still, someone had to do it. 

It hurt him to see a soul, especially his best friend, about to fall down a black hole. 

Narcissa nodded. "Yes, why?" Lucius frowned. Perhaps she had gotten better at concealing her emotions despite her opening up to him, but he needed the truth from her again. 

"Are you sure...? I haven't seen you eat a regular meal in days," he raised an eyebrow. 

Narcissa's eyes darted back and forth as she thought of an excuse but then gave up, considering it was likely no use. Fooling the platinum blonde was way too arduous; he knew everything. She sighed and let her head drop. 

"It's all right. I know you're going through a difficult time right now."

She looked over her shoulder at him before letting out another sigh. 

"You aren't in the best mindset now, but we can work together to help you overcome it." 

A long silence passed before the girl shrugged and muttered, "There's not much we can do to improve things."

Lucius smiled sadly and rested his hand on her shoulder in a comforting manner. "You know how I've assured you your worth isn't defined by your weight or appearance. You also know that you already look beautiful enough. Your mind refuses to believe that. That's a complication, but it's a fixable complication," he said gently.