Shot Throught the Heart

ten

I honestly don't know how long I spent on the floor with mom and Nancy. All three of us in tears mourning the loss of a great man we all loved. None of us could find anything to say as we learned that dad did actually die in his office. At some point the thought went through my brain that I don't know if I'll ever get over this hurt in my heart. This numbness I've been feeling just feels like its now a permeant part of my body and I don't know if I'll ever be able to shake it.

            What felt like hours later mom pulled away from my body and stood up with Nancy. The two of them talked on the couch for a while while I stayed curled in a ball on the floor. When they were speaking I felt my phone go off in my pocket and I somehow managed to pull it out without dropping it. Morgans name lit up the screen with a few new text messages. I swiped up on the screen to unlock my phone and was able to read the messages.

            Flight landed, heading right into a meeting about the op. Hoping to have some good news for you later.

            Op is officially a go with Gold Team as a whole being called in to work. Check your email for the details I'm going to send you. I'll let you fill in your team.

            Finally back home. It's empty without you here.

            And one final text that just came in. Finally in bed now, God, what I would give to have you next to me right now. Call if you need me, I'll have my phone near by.

            That's when I looked up at the time. It was pushing 2am and I knew even though I wanted to call Morgan, I couldn't call now. She needs some sleep after the long day of meetings. But reading her messages was enough to pull me back to the present. I wiped away the lingering tears and slowly stood from the floor. I mumbled to the both of them that I was going to the bathroom and walked out of the office and went down the hall. I pushed the door opened and let it shut behind me as I walked up to the sink. Splashing some cool water on my face helped some of the numbness recede and I was able to wake up a bit more. After I wiped it all away with a towel I didn't dare look at myself in the mirror and turned to leave the bathroom.

            When I got back into the office mom and Nancy were hugging and I was hoping that means things were wrapping up. Nancy pulled away first and walked over to me and pulled me into a hug.

            "He loved you very much Daniella, and he was so very proud of you." Nancy said in my ear.

            "Dad loved you too Nancy, don't ever doubt that he didn't." I said back and held her close.

            Nancy didn't answer but just pulled me closer to her for another few seconds before she let go. She waved at mom before she turned and took her leave. Mom collected the last few things we left in the office and turned to me when she was done.

            "Ready?" She asked looking worn out and tired.

            "Yea" I answered. Mom came over to me and took my hand in hers. Together we looked around the office one final time and turned off the lights and shut the door behind us. Before we walked away from the waiting room, I turned back to the door and slid the golden name plate off the door and held it tightly in my hand.

            I led mom through the building and as we got to the main reception area the two private who took dads stuff to the truck were waiting.

            "Everything is in the bed of the truck ma'am, is there anything else you need from us?" One of them asked.

            "No, you guys are dismissed, thank you for helping us with everything. Have a good night." I said and pulled mom from the building.