Shot Throught the Heart

fourteen

The kiss didn't last long. Only a few seconds after it started we both pulled away from each other. Neither of us spoke as I opened my eyes to find Mallory staring down at me.

            "A piece of me will always belong to you. I wish this could have been our house, Logan to be our son. God, what I would have I done to see you pregnant. I bet you were truly beautiful. Maybe so beautiful I would have been able to convince you to have another one just to see you like it again. I always pictured we would have gotten married on a beach with just a handful of people around and went for a honeymoon somewhere nice. But we tore each other apart before we even really had our chance." Tears were pouring out of my eyes as I paused my speech, my eyes tracing Mallory's.

            "We could have had such a beautiful life but we fucked it up and now it's too late to try and to go back Mal. As much as I want to, I can't. I'm leaving and going into the middle of a war zone for God knows how long and I don't know if I'll come back alive, in a box, or at all. You built a life here and now; Logan needs his mom while I have my own home in Georgia with a girl a owe a lot too." I tried to wipe away the tears that keep coming from Mallory's eyes but it didn't look like there would be an end in sight.

            "I know. Your home isn't here anymore and I know that. A selfish part of me was hoping that you would stay this time but I know that we don't have a chance to try anymore. What I would have given to have had you by my side while I was pregnant. I was so sick during the first half of it, I could barely move from bed most days and even though Troy tried to be there, it was nothing like how you used to take care of me when I was sick back in high school. But God, how I wish for Logan to be ours. You're so good with him, if you were here from the start, he would be wrapped around your finger so tight." Mallory's lips were quivering the whole time so she took a second and collected her thoughts before her eyes found mine again.

            "I know you won't be mine, but can we please just have the rest of the day?" Mallory asked.

            My eyes watered and I could only nod as I tried to swallow the lump in my throat. Mallory tucked her head into the crook of my neck and I couldn't help but wrap my arms around her to hold her close. Both of us were in our own worlds for a while. All I could think about was that finally, after all this time, we both got the closure we needed to have to finally be able to move on with the rest of our lives. I don't know how much longer we were wrapped around each other but all of a sudden, I heard a door shut. Quickly, I rolled us over and reached for the knife in my pocket and looked for the source of the noise.

            Turns out it was the back door. Troy, Shane and Logan were all standing on the back porch and finally I heard Mallory's voice under me and her hand running up and down my back.

            "It's only the boys Dani, it's okay, you're safe here, I promise, come back to me." Mallory took her hand off my back and used it to pull my face towards hers. It took a few seconds for my fight or flight reflex to relax and then I met Mallory's eyes again.

            "There you are. It's okay Dani, you're okay." Mallory said and I finally rolled my body off of hers. I laid down on the grass on my back for a few seconds getting my breathing together before I looked over at Mallory. She is already sitting up smiling at the guys on the porch as I slowly got myself together.

            Once I felt comfortable, I sat up on the grass and wiped my face off, hoping to get rid of the last of my tears. I barely had a few second before I heard my name and looked up to find Logan barreling towards me. I was able to catch him in my arms just in time and held him close.

            "Hi buddy" I said and held onto the kid tightly for a few second before letting go.

            "If I knew you were going to be here with mommy, I would have asked daddy to bring me home sooner." Logan said smiled a toothless smile at me.