i was so much younger yesterday

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Sometimes you don't get what you want. But there are friends who help you realize that you can get what you want.

Lilith and Darius are those kinds of people Raine and Eda need.

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Call them pathetic for all they care, Raine didn't want to get out of bed. Didn't want to move a muscle or think about any words that would pop into their mind. 

They just can't when the realization of it all affects them and it just sucks.

They're already a young grown adult. Fully responsible and has their goals and priorities straight.

It was no surprise that Raine had a good life. Raised by two humble, supporting, and hard-working parents, studied at a good, affordable and reliable university, and has good colleagues and friends throughout the years of their life. 

It was satisfactory and they were content with what they had. So why the heck are they letting the thought of Eda being in love with someone else affect them to the point where they don't want to do anything in their life today?

Oh! That's right!

They're head over heels in love with her for years! Who saw that coming?!

It wasn't just a silly crush, goodness, it was more than that. Way more than just teenagers feeling butterflies inside their stomachs, feeling all energized and euphoric while spending every second with her.

Raine grew out of that phase, knowing the feeling too well. They fell hard.

Down hard.

Young, pretty, beautiful Edalyn Clawthorne who stole their heart in high school is in love with someone else. And that should be okay! 

They should be okay. But it doesn't make it any less sorrowful for them.

What do they even have that the person Eda's in love with doesn't?

She's in love with someone. Someone that's not them. 

Someone that Raine couldn't be for her.

So they just have to take their time to suck it up, think things through, plan what to do what's next with their non-existent love life, accept the truth, and contemplate how to handle the indirect rejection. They are sure as hell to know that they just got rejected last night.

Raine always has a backup plan. That's a lesson Eda made them le-

No no, don't think about her or you'll never get past this and things would be more complicated between you two.

They were lucky today was a day off and that they'd already finished the activities needed before the deadline. It gave more time for Raine to think, to ruminate, to...grieve?

What the heck am I grieving for? The sudden death of my hopes of having my best friend as my girlfriend?

Raine then sooner agrees to their thoughts in silence.

Today was definitely a rough day.

And if it doesn't get any rougher, their roommate's loud, booming voice of complaints coming from the kitchen proves them otherwise. Gentle thuds of footsteps proceed to get closer and closer, briefly stopping as it indicates the figure had already reached Raine's door.

"Alright, I've had enough of this." Darius enters the room uninvited, not even bothering to knock. "It's 10:30 am, your breakfast's already gone cold, and you're still wrapped around in a blanket and still haven't got out of bed. Are you sick?"

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