Blood In The Water

27

"Connor.. Connor, Baby, open up.." Kevin knocked on the shabby apartment door

He'd allowed himself the night to calm down, for Connor to relax and get out of 'panic mode' as he calls it. But Kevin's not a patient man. He wasn't going to wait around while Connor resented him.

"Connor.. Doll, I'm sorry.. I fucked up, I know... just open the door... c'mon, please.."

After a long silence, the door of Connor's apartment creaked open. There, stood Connor, in his trousers and undershirt, looking like he hadn't slept more than an hour. His eyes were agitated and watery.

"...Babydoll. Ya look beautiful.."

"Look like shit.." he mumbled

"You ain't never looked bad... can I come in?"

"...sure." He stepped aside after a moment of hesitation

Kevin closed the front door behind himself, strolling slowly into the dingy apartment

"..you feelin' okay?"

"Fine... you startled me, that's all.."

"I didn't mean to Baby, I'd never hurt ya.. it was an accident, I got too rough.."

"Yeah, well... Steven used to get too rough with me by accident, too." Connor crossed his arms

"God.. I'm so fuckin' sorry, Doll.. There ain't enough 'sorry's in the world, I mean it, I ain't never gonna let myself get like that again, never.. I ain't never gonna yell at you again, I ain't never gonna grab ya... I swear, never... I'm sorry. Broke my fuckin' heart to scare ya like that.."

"...I'm not going to feel sorry for you"

"That ain't what I want. I want ya to know I'm sorry.. I mean it, I don't apologize, haven't in years, but.. I'm apologizin'.. I'm really fuckin' sorry. I don't know what the fuck got into me.. and I... I ain't never gonna scare you again.. never. I fucked up. I know I did, I fucked up real bad.. just lemme make it up to you.."

"..how? A fancy dinner? Flowers? Will that make up for treating me like your display china?"

"You ain't.. I'm sorry. You are my equal, I know you are, n' I'm so fuckin' sorry I made you feel like I think you you ain't.. I ain't used to.. havin' an equal, not like this .. and I know you are, I always known, I knew when I met ya, you're the only fella that is.. but I ain't used to not bein' treated like I'm better..  than everyone.. m'sorry I treated you like that, okay? .. I never meant to. Cause I sure as hell don't think it.. I adore ya. I worship you, doll you're the only fella I can say any'a this about.."

"... I don't belong to you. I don't belong to anybody."

"I know that.. n' I'm sorry, I don't know why I said all that.. I didn't mean none of it. I just started mouthin' off.. I didn't mean it, ya know I didn't..."

"I know. But you were an ass.."

"I was.. and I'm so fuckin' ashamed of it."

"...you frightened me. I know you're sorry, I know you didn't mean to, but you did.. and if you ever talk to me like that again, treat me like that, grab me like that again, I won't forgive you.." he glared

"I know.. nor should ya.. I ain't never gonna scare ya like that again.. I'm gonna be better.. and this ain't gonna be no flimsy fuckin' restaurant apology.. I'll make it up to ya, really.."

"I don't want some grand gesture.. I just want it to change.."

"It will, Babydoll, I swear.." he placed both hands gently on Connor's shoulders