Blissful pleasure // Larry stylinson

2

Harry's pov

The smell of the flowers, underneath my nose as Louis held them up to my face. The beautiful colours all blending together, nothing would ever be as beautiful as him. Looking up from under my eyelashes I peer into his unbelievably perfect eyes. The touches of green that fall on the outside of them, the rest a blue that could paint the colour of my future. I never want to blink, I need to take them in. I need them engraved into my mind forever.

'Smile. Harry smile. You'll scare him.'

I blink out of my daze and smile carefully at the pretty boy in front of me. The flowers now resting on my chest, I can feel my heart pounding in my ears. It's almost painful how much I need to be near him.

"Hi" snaps me out of my dizzy eyes, looking back in the foreground I see his head tilted just a little bit, almost like he's trying to find me through my eyes. Like he knew I was lost for a second. He knows me well.

Taking as step forward I walk closer to the counter, he moves back a tiny bit, no one would notice that. I did, I smile a little bigger. Knowing my dimples will comfort him to some degree. I reach back to grab my wallet to pay and the delicate hand reaches towards me to stop.

"take them" all he said yet I feel like he just spoke into my mind.

'He wants me to keep them, maybe he'll see them again soon'

"No, no really it's okay, thank you but I'll pay please" I try and smile wider but I don't think it's possible to make that happen. My brain feels scattered, he's so pretty. Even just reaching to grab the money from my hands, he looks ethereal.

'Well done'

"Louis." I can barely keep eye contact as I speak, my hands are shaking. The feeling of my heart coming out of my chest. "I'll come back tomorrow, make me something that makes you happy. Whatever it is. I'd like that"

Not waiting for an answer, or smile. I turn and leave, not wanting to face the look of surprise. His eyes would crinkle and his lips would twitch just a little bit.

'Keep walking Harry. Go put the pretty flowers in some water. Get back on your boat. Todays the day'

Getting home, My doors open. Just a bit. I closed it I remember. Pushing it open slowly, flowers tight against my chest, think of his eyes, remind myself that he's mine. Grab the knife out of the draw in the side table by the door. It's not there.

The bang from the kitchen, like someone cutting something. I peer around the corner. It's me. I'm cutting up a pear, it's ripe and the juice is falling over my hands, I can feel it but it's not on me. I remember when I felt that. I look to my right and see the mess I left. The juice not from the pear but myself. The blood spilling over my fingers.

I see myself turn towards me, mirroring my movements, I see him raise the hand to his mouth, licking the blood off of his fingers. Tasting the blood.

"Harry"

The knife I placed against my neck.

"Harry"

He walks towards me, I feel his hand wrap around my neck, knife against my own cheek.

"Harry" the flowers fall, my head spins to the side. Those pretty, blue eyes. They stare into my soul. 

I'd taken one step, I hadn't even left the shop. The jingle of the bell brings me back while I stare into his eyes. The blue reminding me of being alive. A person comes in, I hear their footsteps stop. I need to speak.

'Will you? When have you ever done anything for anyone besides yourself?'

"Sorry" spits out of my mouth before I can think of anything else. I turn and lean down to pick up the flowers, I try to move it's hard but I push my feet forward. Turn towards the sea, home to far too see.