The Journal Of Martlina 1882

JOURNAL FIFTEEN

November 8th, 1882

I did some thinking these past few days and did absolutely nothing around the farm. 

I have packed what little belongings I had, some fresh bread, some water, and jarred foods that we made a while back in case of an emergency. 

I'm leaving, I can't stay and take care of this farm by myself and wait for the collectors to come and ask for money I don't have. We buried my mother in the backyard, by we I mean myself and the priest. He let me know he looked into things financially for me hoping to have something to offer... my mother didn't have a dime to her name. Nothing was left by my father. I guess I am not surprised, or if he did leave something it wouldn't have been in the hands of a stranger but would have already been given to my mother. 

I had a tool belt around me, with an ax, and clothes for the different seasons. I don't know my plan besides to head where I cannot be found. Probably to the miles and miles of woods that you can get to from town.

Only problem... I have to get through town with no one seeing me so I can't be reported as running away. Wish it worked on my sister. 

They will take the house, sell it, burn it or do whatever they want. My brothers will come home to nothing if they come home at all. My sister, who I am undoubtedly positive is dead considering I just saw the man she was so in love with the other day at the market. I am not sure how he wasn't drafted... but he wasn't. He was with his wife and children.

We made eye contact, he knew who I was and I knew who he was. He looked away pretty swiftly with such a guilty look on his face. She is dead or long gone.

I can only save so many people. 

It is time to save myself.