Life smells like death

Chapter 5

A breakdown was what followed after the sorrowful expression of the doctor, accompanying the words he wish he'd never had to hear.

"I'm sorry, for your loss..."

Now, the funeral is being planned by Aerin and his aunt while he is frozen, only able to cry.
If he wants to be honest with himself, he knew this would be the outcome of the surgery. He knew his mum, unfortunately, wouldn't last long, he was embracing himself with this thought, he believed he was ready to deal with the loss, with the grief. Yet... he wasn't.

Nobody can be ready to experience such a morbid moment. Hyunjin, who was able to fight cancer, so many times, never did he believe this same illness would have taken his mother away from him.

Fate proved him wrong, showing how not every fight is meant to be won.
Still, he felt himself asking... why her? Why her and not me? Why did this happen to me me?

And then again... why would this happen to anyone else?

"Hyunjin... baby... please answer me. Do you need a doctor?"

"N-no Chan hyung. I- I'm okay. I- I'll be okay, someday."

"Do you want to see your mum?"

"Y-yeah. Can you help me get up? I don't thing o have the strength to do it."

"Of course Hyunnie. I'll be there for you every step of the way."

...

"Why are there so many people-"

"I- I think it's a funeral-"

"What!?" Minho frantically ran into the house.

...

"Hyunjin!? Hyunjin?!"

"W-wha- Minho hyung?"

"Oh my God! Hyunjin thank the universe! You are okay! Oh God! I was so scared I thought- you-"

Hyunjin was in Minho's embrace, which thankfully, was strong enough to hold his weight as his legs were betraying him.

"Not me hyung... my mum... Cancer."

That's all it took for the tears to start falling again. That's what it took for Minho to start apologizing and hugging his precious member.

"We should slowly head to the graveyard-"

...

~Two weeks later~

"Hyung, I think we should get on with our schedules."

"Hyunjin... are you sure? We can have all the time-"

"No hyung! We don't have all the time, hence we don't even have enough time, please. Let's just- My mum won't come back and even if she did, she would never want to see me and you all suffer because of her. I knew this would happen, I wasn't ready for it. I want to weep and cry and scream but it is not fair and it will not help me move on. I've been doing this for two weeks now and- and all I've done was lose time. I don't want to lose anymore time hyung... it is precious and- I want to smile again... I want us to be like we were and be happy... for as long as I have."

"Oh Hyunjin... I know... but please don't think like that! We are all going to be healthy and happy and together till the end. It's not like we're gonna die tomorrow... right Hyunnie?"

"Y-yeah. You are r-right, it's not like I have a brain tumor!"

"Exactly! But, either way I respect your opinion and I believe you are right... we should get back on schedule. I can speak with the management-"

"Yeah, you go do that Chan and while you are at it I will be stealing Hyunjin away from you. We have to go shopping now excuse us!"

"Uh- Minho hyung when did we-"

"Shhh! Come on my treat!"

"Well then... I've seen some pieces in Gucci and..."

...

"Hyunjin...?"

"Oh- uh- hi Jisung."

"What are you doing up at a time like this?"

"I was just- I needed some water-"

"And what's that in your hand?"

"Oh just- a painkiller- you know my migraines suck. "

"Oh no! You've got a migraine? Do you need me to help you? Should I make you a bath-"

"No, no! There's no need. I'm going to take this and go straight to sleep. You should do that too Sungie! Tomorrow we have practice!"

"Okay. Are you sure it's just a migraine?"

"Yes... I promise!"

"If you are sure about it. Good night Jinnie! Sleep well."

"Oh I will. You too sweets!"

When Jisung made it out of the small kitchen Hyunjim let go of a breath he wasn't aware he had been holding.
Signing he took out of his pocket the bottle of pills he hidden in there in a state of panic and poured another pill or two.
He couldn't have risked Jisung getting to know his struggles with sleep or else suspicions would not be prevented.

The pills slipped down his dry throat and sleep engulfed him soon.

...

"Hyunjin!"

"..."

"Hyunjin!"

"..."

"Hyunjin wake up right now or I'm calling Chan! Chan!?"

No matter how many times Felix called, no, shouted his name he didn't seem to wake up.
Having heard the the threat Chan entered the room.

"What’s wrong Lixie?"

"Hyung he does- he doesn't wake up! I can't wake him up! Oh God hyung! What do we do?! What do we do!?"

"Minho! Changbin!"

"What- Lixie-"

"Bin take Felix out of the room and keep the others in the living room. Minho help."

"What happened?"

"Hyunjin won't wake up."

"Okay."

Minho firstly checked for a pulse, which thankfully was there, beating regularly. He then checked for his breathing and nothing seemed out of the ordinary.

"Hyung. His vitals are normal. We should be able to wake him up maybe he was just really tired either mentally or physically. We should try to wake him up again... Hyunnie? Baby... please wake up...don't you want to practice?"

Only then did Hyunjin's figure seemed to slowly get connected with the real world.

"Chan. Did you wear perfume on your wrists?"

"Um- yeah like always- Hey! Why did you grab me with such force!?"

"So that Hyunjin,can smell it. That way we will help him slowly gain consciousness. Oh! There he is! Hello sleepy head! You gave us quiet a scare you know!"

"Ugm- "

"Hyunjin?"

"W-what- why are you like that?"

"Oh Jinnie you wouldn't wake up. No matter what."

"Really? Oh no! What time is it?! Are we late?!"

"No! No, we are not. Here let me help you get ready and then we can go."