All that is dark | ✓

17| monster

HE WAS INSANE. IT was something she had already been well aware off, but now, with a smile stained with blood and a corpse by his side it was even more blindingly clear to her. He seemed euphoric at the sight of her, knocking one of the guards out with a clean hit against the neck without even bothering to look away from her. Was it an obsession? If not that, why else would he have this expression on his face, the one that told her that before this nothing had mattered, that the only thing he cared about was seeing her?

Three guards slammed him to the floor, but he didn't even glance at them. There was no way he was going to win this, not when all the guards in solitary were on edge as well, many already having their weapon ready. Shooting him would be the last resort considering how much of a high profile prisoner he was and how vast his criminal network, but that didn't mean none of them would succumb to their fear and pull the trigger. None of them wanted to end up like their colleague.

They didn't need to be afraid of that. After he had killed him, Nathan had kept his gaze on her, as if waiting for her approval to continue. In a sick way, he probably thought he was doing this for her. To be honest, she wasn't much better. Even after all her talk about trying to minimize the damage, the true reason she was here was because a part of her empathized with him. She didn't see him as a monster, even though she knew she should have. Besides, wasn't this exactly the reaction she should've expected from him?

"Don't look guilty, Helene," he smiled," none of their blood is on your hands. If you hadn't come, I would have killed them all anyway."

"Nathan," she said softly," why did you do that?"

"You know the answer," he said, looking at her with such warmth that it was hard to be angry," for you. I would do anything for you."

"You think that reason is justified?" one of the guards holding him shouted," don't pretend it was for anyone but yourself, you bastard! Landon had a wife, three children -"

"So do you," Nathan said," do you feel bad for him because he reminds you of yourself or simply because he was in close proximity to you? Do you think that selfishness makes you a better person?"

"Selfishness?" the guard exclaimed, pressing him harder to the ground," how dare you say something like that when you don't even have a conscience."

"A hundred thousand," Nathan said," that's how many people die each day. Do you mourn for all of them? What's the difference between this man on the floor right now and another a country away?"

"The difference is that you killed him in front of me," the guard snarled.

"So things only matter when they personally affect you?" Nathan asked," is that not the definition of selfishness?"

The guard parted his lips, but no sound came out. His conviction seemed to be wavering, but Nathan always had had a way of doing that to people. No one liked admitting they were selfish, even though every human was, at the core of their being. They pulled him up and dragged him off towards solitary, Nathan complying well to their surprise. Though they all were on edge, none of them seemed to expect he'd pull something again so close to his cell. Of course they wouldn't, not if he was sane.

And then, in the fraction of a second before they passed her, he suddenly grabbed a few locks of her hair, pulling her closer at once. His lips almost grazed past, but Dante already pulled her back before he could do so, the guards immediately slamming him against the wall. Even though Dante tried to made sure she was okay, she couldn't keep her eyes off Nathan, his gaze flicking from Dante's hands on her shoulders back to hers.

"You changed your shampoo," he said.

Her hand flew to her hair, the blood from his hands still warm in the gold of her locks.