unlikely // jeff winger x reader

pt 19

TRIGGER WARNING FOR
OVERDOSE/ SUICIDE OF A FAMILY MEMBER

(jeff pov)

she walked so deliberately i almost didnt want to follow her, it seemed as though she had unfinished business with city college that i didnt want to get in the way of.

we were at the library, the windows obscured by paintball splatters.

i didn't realize it was only us.

she pulled me into the room and closed the door behind us, sticking a chair leg into the handles to lock the door.

she didnt say a word to me as she secured the room.

her gun was sticking out of the waistband of her shorts, ready to go for anyone she saw as a threat.

i noticed her hand reach for the gun, and for a split second i thought she brought me here to 'kill' me.

she set the gun on the table.

the soft click of the gun on the table was blaring loud in the silence of the room.

she looked up at me, her face softening and her shoulders relaxing.

she sighed, slumping down beside the table and holding her head in her hands.

"god," she said.

i sat down beside her, not saying anything.

i didnt want to mess this up anymore than i might have already.

"what the hell are we doing here, jeff, what?" she asked, though it was clearly rhetorical.

"paintba-"

"no," she cut me off. "what are we doing. what was pierce even talking about? money..."

for once i didnt know what to say.

she didnt look at me as she spoke.

"look, im tired. i want to go home. the beginning was fun and all but its what, 3 am?"

i looked up at the clock, it's numbers entirely covered in paint.

"could be," i said.

she looked up and chuckled slightly. "god, is your school always like this, or did i just choose a really shitty day to start classes?"

"a bit of both, actually,"

for the first time in what felt like hours, she looked at me.

"youre funny," she remarked, her eyes drifting over my face. "and youre different than i thought youd be."

"yeah well, i could say the same about you."

the tick of the clock we couldn't see felt like it grew louder the longer we talked.

"yeah? how so?" she queried, arms crossing over her chest.

"yknow, normally i would never be this open with anyone, not even myself now that i think about it but, you make me feel alive again." i started. i couldn't believe i was just telling her this. what was i doing?
"this place will trap you, y/n, it's trapped me already. you are still free and i think that makes me excited for you and all the things you could be if you didnt some to this godforsaken school. youre already one of the coolest people i know and ive known you for what, a day? get out while you still can, please. youre special, and you deserve to be great."

she looked at me with a small smile on her face. she opened her mouth to talk but stopped before she said anything.

(author pov)

she nodded, and looked away once again.

in a moment of pure vulnerability, she spoke.

"im not free jeff, im running."

her eyes darted up to jeffs again, her breath hitching in her throat.

he looked at her as if she might break if he looked too hard, though he knew she could probably withstand anything.

"my brother overdosed last year." she said, a small flicker in her eye. "im running from the pitiful stares at the grocery store, the condolences and the sorry for your loss bullshit. im running from everything that reminds me i will never get to hear him laugh again or go to another one of his baseball games. i moved here to get away from all that, and somehow it still feels exactly the same. im not free, im tethered to my past like everyone else. im not special."

her eyes fell back to her shoes with a heavy stare.

a million words ran though jeffs head before he found the words.

"wow. youre just as messed up as the rest of us, maybe you do belong here."

she laughed, the tears in her eyes falling gently onto her cheeks.

"i cant believe i just told you that," she said, throwing her hands in the air. "i didnt think i would be telling anybody that to be honest."

"well," jeff said. "greendale does funny things to people."

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word count: 754

WOW its been a long time. im so sorry for not updating, im so behind on all my books its ridiculous. boy drama really drains the life out of you.
also why does this chapter still feel SO SHORT. sorry abt any bad grammar or whatever, didn't really have time to edit.

- ur local canadian fanfic writer <333