The Dick Gawd

Broken

4 Months Later

Ell

Rubbing Jaida's back I lightly kiss her on the head and lower her into her crib. Jackson had been sleeping for about forty-five minutes, but Jaida had been a little fussy today, so she took a little longer to go down than her brother did.

Kissing both of my babies one final time I ease my way out of the room and close the door behind me a bit. Heading downstairs I peak in on bean who's sitting on the couch watching Moana. Giggling I head into the living room and sit down on the couch next to her. Without saying a word, she snuggles up into my side and continues to watch the movie.

With my arm firmly around my baby girl I let out a small sigh while sending up a quick prayer of thanks. Things were finally getting back to normal for us. It had been a long road and it was far from easy going, but with the help of a therapist we were able to work through our feelings of failure, disappointment and insecurity. See we all felt as if we had failed each other in some way shape or form and it was causing us all to work overtime in the aftermath and that was causing all of us to be exhausted and emotionally depleted. So, when I suggested Family and Individual therapy to Leati he was all for it. It took some time but slowly yet surely Bean, Em, Leati and I all started to come to grips with what happened and put the blame squarely on who it belonged to Gianna and Titan.

After everything that they did to us therapy was exactly what we needed, even Lina had come to family therapy with us a few times. It brought us all closer together. Well not quite all because I was still not talking to Landon or Deja, its just every time I thought about them, I got so damn angry. My blood still boils at the thought of how they just decided they could make better decisions in regard to my life than I could. That they could protect my family better than I could, when in reality they almost got all of us killed.

Bean gingerly adjusts herself so that her head is laying in my lap as I gently stroke her head and play with her hair with one hand and lightly run my hand over my chin and slowly shake my head. I don't know what makes me angrier the fact that they decided to make decisions that almost destroyed my family or the fact that they acted like they Leati and I should just fall in line and understand. It felt like they weren't apologetic in the least about what they had done which was why I felt justified in not speaking to either of them. Well almost not speaking to them because there was still Emma to consider, and regardless of what happened between her dad and I, I would never kick her out of my life or tell her she couldn't come over, so we were on texting terms only when it came to Emma, but I made sure to always keep it short and sweet. Even in the event when he tried to talk about other things, I only answered the questions that pertained to Emma. Anything else was on a need-to-know basis and if it wasn't about Emma he didn't need to know.....Shit well, that wasn't one hundred percent true we did allow him to speak and see bean so if the messages were about either of them, they were answered if they were about anything else they went unanaswered.

It hurt but Leati and I had major issues with him but we knew that Bean still adored her uncle and we weren't going to encourage her to feel otherwise however as far as visits since Leati and I were not speaking to them we were also not going to his home and since Leati refused to allow her to go over to his home alone as he was nowhere near comfortable with that notion and Lina and I refused to try and convince him otherwise as his feelings were valid, the only way bean could go over was if she was accompanied by Aunt Liv, or Lina. It made for a bit of a complicated game of who is available but at the moment this is the only way we can make sure the girls can still spend time with each other in almost the same manner they could before. None of this is there fault so neither of them should be penalized for the issues the adults were currently having with each other.