Life Sentence

CHAPTER 14

A week had passed, no, more like an eternity for Kubra, maintaining the façade that she was all fine and well.

She would force the food in her stomach and command it with everything she had to remain inside just until she could separate herself from her parents. Then she would rush to the toilet and flush it all out.

She would lay on the hard floor, which was still too plush with the carpet, until the exhaustion from doing nothing all day take over her and she would pass out.

Or she would simply gaze at the moon from her window, just like she did in the cell. In the cell, she used to count the days she could be free again. In the luxurious suffocating confines of her home, she couldn’t help but wonder if she would’ve been well off in the cell.

She sighed with the toothbrush still in her mouth, staring at the haunted corpse that was much like her own. How long can I keep this pretense up? She wondered.

One thing she couldn’t fake was touching another living being. She couldn’t ignore the creepy feeling when her mother would try to caress her cheek or when her father would try to pat her on the back. The ants would sting instantly and she would be repulsed immediately.

Except for Saad, of course. But he seemed to be more concerned about not letting her starve (he was failing miserably but she didn’t want him to know). She didn’t blame him, not really. It was the default setting in humans that hunger came before anything else. No matter how much mentally unstable she was, she needed to eat first. And it wasn’t like everyone knew that there was a mean person who was a figment of her own imagination who was trying to bring her twenty steps back with every step she took forward.

She spat the minty toothpaste out and looked at her reflection, determined enough to conquer the world, but this determination would barely be enough to win over her own demons.

It couldn’t go on like this forever. She couldn’t do it anymore, albeit it had only just been a week.

“Great, are we finally going to say goodbye to this world?” KB said excitedly, an emotion Kubra hadn’t seen on her until now.

She tied her hair in a ponytail and put on her tracksuit, covering herself adequately to keep the cold out and fastened her joggers.

“No, we’re getting out of our haven.”

*~*~*~*

Saad stopped the car in front of Kubra’s house at exact seven-thirty in the morning. It was fairly early for the donuts and coffee he’d brought her, but something told him that she would be awake, and by the way she’d been throwing up everything, he knew she would be starving as well.

Grabbing the box of sugary deliciousness and cup of bitter coffee, he made his way into the house. He would surgically put the food in her if that’s what it took for her to keep it down.

But when he entered the hall, the earth got snatched from under his feet. When he saw Sonia Shahbaz half-fainted on the couch, tears staining her cheeks, a maid who also was visibly worried tending to her, he immediately assumed the worst.

Had something happened to Kubra?

Had she done something to herself?

Was he going to have a repeat of that dreadful night in the hospital when she’d almost left him?

What had she done to herself? Pills? Hanging? Cuts?

No. He shouldn’t think like this. He forced his raging thoughts to a stop.

He didn’t remember putting the items in his hands on the table as he rushed towards Sonia. Sitting on his knees on the floor by her, he grabbed her hands and rubbed them. “Aunty, what is it? What happened? Kubra’s fine, right?”