Rip and Tear (Into my A**):(Doomguy X reader)

Banger Hanger

"Vega! Open the portal to earth."

You munched on a muffin.

"I apologize, but I can not do that."

You froze.

"What?"

"I have received orders from the Slayer, you are to remain here until he returns, or if-"

"Don't finish that sentence." You sighed and clenched your teeth against the subtle burn of anger tainting your palate. "That mother-fucker dare lock me in? I am not a FUCKING animal."

"I believe that the slayer was worried the earth may come under attack, he does not mean to harm you."

You knew that much, but the whole 'being treated like glass' thing was getting rather old, especially when you still vividly remembered how NOT gentle he was when drilling a permanent imprint of his dick into the place behind your belly button.

"I can not believe he would be such an ass!" He was treating you like a princess in a tower, and sure you had liked it in bed that ONE time but that ultimately wasn't you.

You needed to do something, you had the potential to save lives on earth and you would be damned if you failed.

"Vega, what parts of this fortress do I have access to?"

"The Slayer indicated all parts except for the workshop, weapons range, and my control stations."

You scoffed "I mean I get the other two, but why the workshop?"

"He was afraid that you would use the tools there to access my controls and perhaps return to earth without his escort."

"Well-okay he was right but I don't NEED his fucking escort!" you needed to get back to earth, you had duties to attend to, without you the airborne missile system would never get it's proper rotational hydraulics installed and while it wasn't as effective (apparently) as your new fiancé it could still help.

"He's not the only one trying to fight, we've been planning a military push-back for years!"

"I apologize, I...do not think it is wise to subvert my programming, the Slayer is correct when he speaks of the danger on earth, this is not something a person can handle."

"Not alone." you stuffed the rest of your muffin in your mouth and narrowed your eyes at the stubbornly closed portal. "But that's the thing about humans, none of us are ever really alone."

You went to the bathroom, one of the only places on the base that Vega could not see in.

You had learned that the first time you had ever spent the night, walking out in only a towel and running directly into the object of your (at the time) lustful affections.

It also bordered the workroom that you had insistently set up after one too many kinks in your back from sitting on the floor.

You mentally apologized to your fiancé and picked up the lid of the toilet tank.

You rammed it through the drywall.

"I should have anticipated this."

"Yeah, well that's on you." You snarked at Vega and rushed over to the workbench, hands already twisting wires together. "I'll fix the drywall later."

Vega actually gave the equivalent of a robotic sigh. "The spare drywall is in the storage closet, please take care to repaint with the shade labeled 'cotton cream' and not the true white."