ELAYNE

For the better

I woke up with a swollen face, puffy eyes and an empty heart. His side of the bed was empty. I rubbed my tear stained cheeks without getting up from the bed. I hated what I was feeling. I shifted my sight towards the window through which warm light entered the room. An irritated groan slipped out of my mouth. I hated sunny days.
I had no intention to think about last night but my mind won't let it depart from my mind. I wanted to ask him about it but something inside me was terrified to make him angry.

I let out a hard sigh and pulled off the sheets from my body. I roamed through the study and through the front window, noticing the absence of August's car.
I made my way towards the kitchen in hopes that he might've cooked something before leaving but ended up pausing infront of August's room.
I hesitantly entered it with an odd anxiety crippling in my heart. I didn't want to see anything that could kill me.
I wrapped my fingers around the locket of my neck chain and took slow steps into the room. It was still clean just like the previous time.
My eyes wandered around, observing the pictures hanging on the walls.
"He sure had a good childhood" i thought to myself as I took one of his childhood pictures in my hand. A smile spread across my face as I watched the tiny August and his parents.
I went towards the book shelves which were filled with the type of books I favoured. Not to lie, his choices were just my taste.
I sadly smiled thinking how similar we are but yet, too different.
I never wanted to be nosy but I couldn't help myself from going through his things. Standing infront of the wardrobe, I looked down at my hand which were shaking and sweating at the same time.
I grabbed the handle and forcefully tried to pull it.
"Tskk.. It's locked!" I sighed, my blood was boiling with an unknown anger.
It was too much for me to take in. I didn't even got to see what those letters were. A part of me wanted to believe that it was all a misunderstanding but his actions were not aligning with what I wanted.
"Why would he lock his drawers if there's only two people living here, one being me ", I scratched my forehead aggressively and slammed the door behind me before leaving.

I caught myself zoning out from time to time, not listening to a single sentence anybody was saying. Unfortunately, the professor caught my attention and asked me what he was teaching at the moment.
"I'm sorry sir.. I don't know."i said.
"Why are you even here then Miss? "
I could only stare at the ground while he embarrassed me infront of everyone in the class.
"You can leave.." He uttered, causing me to get up from my seat and towards the door. He wasn't expecting me to react that aggressive, but my state of mind was finally getting the best of me. With him in my mind, I couldn't breathe.
I cussed under my breathe and ran towards the cafeteria, hoping to eat away my worries.
I placed myself at one of the chairs and pulled out the books that I borrowed last day. I spent almost the whole morning reading the fiction, immersing into a different reality which seemed less scary than the one I was in.
I could hear the sound of footsteps approaching me as the cafeteria was almost empty . I kept focusing on the pages infront of me, not wanting to deal with anything else at the moment.
"Hey..." A voice called me.
I looked up to meet a pair of black eyes staring right at me.
I furrowed my eyebrows.
"Do I know you?" I asked.
I could see a mix of emotions interchanging on her face.
She kept staring at me, almost stunned.
"Uhh... Pardon?" I said.
Now I was dumbfounded.
"Are you okay?" I asked.
She nodded her head aggressively up and down
"Ohhh... I'm sorry. I thought you were someone else. It's my mistake." She finally spoke.
I let out a chuckle and nodded. She took the seat beside me as I offered her . We talked a lot and let's just say, I made myself an acquaintance who has a potential to maybe become the one to accompany me here.
Talking to a new person really did elevated my mood and hence, I took myself out of the cafeteria and towards the campus garden. It was my favourite spot to sit peacefully. Eventhough I only had morning classes today, I decided to spent more time there since the thought of going home made me sick. Just then, August called me. I hesitantly picked it up and kept quiet.