From Day One | JENSOO

Chapter 40

Who I was, in the end.

"Unnie, come onnnnn," Ella whined, tugging on Jennie's arm that simply would not budge no matter which way Ella pulled.

"Unnie is too tired to play, E," Jennie said, mumbling against her warm pillow. Her bed was just too comfortable and she was too lazy.

Ella blew out a frustrated hmph and Jennie thought it'd be the end of that but Ella put Jennie's arm over her shoulder and pulled with everything she had. Usually, by this time Ella would quit but Jennie noticed the small girl was oddly determined.

"Okay, okay," Jennie assented because she'd hate for all of Ella's efforts to go to waste.

Ella's face lit up with excitement, her eyes widening with anticipation as Jennie dragged herself out of bed.

"Follow me unnie!" Ella bellowed as she ran out of the room and Jennie could hear her little feet scurry down the steps.

"Slow down, you're going to fall!" Jennie shouted in warning, smoothing down her hair to fix it as best she could. She looked at herself in her vanity mirror and brought a hand up to her swollen eyes. She looked like she hadn't slept for weeks or had been crying equally as long. Or both.

She tore her eyes away from the mirror when she heard the downstairs front door slam.

"Ella?"

A low rumble from outside blended with Jennie's footsteps as she descended downstairs. She walked out barefoot, too preoccupied with finding Ella to think of shoes because her heart was pounding and she had come close to near death accidents to not have them pollute her mind. But Ella was on the pathway, next to a motorcycle, next to a kneeling Jisoo. Seconds later, Ella ran back into the house, lollipop in hand.

Jennie stepped out onto the path, a little hesitant and she hated feeling that way around Jisoo.

"Bribing my little sister to get to me. Someone's getting desperate," Jennie joked, her smile tightlipped and devoid of any real happiness. If there was any part of her that was happy, it was because Jisoo was there, still on common soil.

"You know I'd do anything," Jisoo responded sincerely.

The sentence alone was enough to punch through Jennie's composure. It seemed like everything made her cry these days.

"Whatever you want Jisoo, do it quick? I'm sick of crying."

Jisoo looked up to the sky, past the roof of Jennie's house where gray, billowy clouds were advancing ominously. They'd cover up the sun soon.

"I know this isn't easy for you, but it isn't for me either. I'm hurting you, I know that. I hate that I'm the one doing it. You have no idea what that feels like."

"Oh yea? Does it feel a little like being abandoned?"

Jisoo recoiled visibly and Jennie instantly regretted what she said.

"This was supposed to be our summer," Jennie told Jisoo, approaching her with a volatile mixture of emotions, all of them ready to either spill over or drown Jennie.

"We were supposed to be together because we couldn't do that for years. Does that mean nothing to you?"

"It means everything to me!" Jisoo yelled out, her voice breaking because it wasn't used to ever being so loud. Jennie couldn't remember the last time Jisoo yelled.

"Then why are you leaving me?!"

They were faced with a battle neither could fully understand. Jisoo couldn't explain to Jennie she wasn't leaving her, just the country, and Jennie couldn't explain that her feelings saw no difference because it still meant Jisoo was leaving.