Rewriting Fate

Baby Joke

It was a normal day for class A. Thanks to things calming down and the temperature starting to get colder, the group of 22 counting Eri and Tenko began feeling the chills start going down their spines. "Dang I hate when it gets cold." Sero speaks up with Eri shaking off a chill she had.

"You ok, Snowball?"

"I'm ok daddy. It's just a little cold." Izuku smiled at his daughter before Tenko began sneezing to alert everyone. They glanced where Tsu was to see his face dripping snot for her to take a paper towel and wipe it off before trying to grab the towel.

"Well, it seems someone wants to see what Tsu has." Everyone started laughing a little at this before the door opened. Once it did, it showed Mei walking in with a strange thing wrapped in a blanket in her hands. "Hey, Mei. Whatcha got there?"

"Oh, it's just a baby you'd love to see, Izuku." Everyone who was aware of how easily her inventions explode to start backing up. When she moved her arms, Mei began revealing what was in the blanket. What it was was actually a small child with Izuku's freckles and hairstyle sucking on a pacifier. The most notable thing about this child is that it had pink hair and golden eyes similar to Mei's own. "Tada! May I present to you, a baby!"

".....WHAT!?" Everyone shouted for Mei to smile happily with the child acting calmly.

Immediately, Shoko grabbed Izuku by his shirt collar and began shaking him. "IZUKU! WHY WOULD YOU ALLOW HER TO BARE YOUR CHILD AND LEAVE ME WITHOUT ONE!? YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I'D LOVE TO CARRY YOUR CHILDREN IN ME AND I'M READY WHENEVER YOU WISH TO PLANT YOUR SEED IN ME TO DO THIS!" Izuku couldn't listen to Shoko as his vision began going blurry to pass out and be unable to speak. "WAKE UP! DON'T GO TO SLEEP ON ME WHEN THIS IS HAPPENING!?"

"Crap! Midoriya! You ok!?" Sero immediately grabbed Izuku out of Shoko's hands to begin slapping him to try and pull the OFA user out of the shock he was in. "C'mon man, stay with me!" He kept slapping Izuku with Hatsume laughing like a mad woman. Behind her though, Ochako stood with a desk ready to pound Mei's head in for not only putting Izuku in this panic attack, but not choosing to take some precautions when they would do what they would.

"I HOLD OUT STARTING A FAMILY AND MAKING ERI AND TENKO MORE FAMILY MEMBERS TO HELP DEKU, AND YOU GO AND YOU DO SOMETHING STUPID LIKE GETTING YOURSELF PREGNANT!? THAT ISN'T FAIR, HATSUME!"

"Before you slam my head in, I'd like to show you something you might find fascinating." Mei pulled the blanket off the child to show it was only a strange mechanical bean shaped item with a face and some hair on it. "See? No babies....biologically his at least." Mei began laughing at her act with everyone in the class shocked by this as she continued. "Izuku didn't plant a bun in this oven...yet."

Now hearing new words and phrases, Eri moves to pull Momo's uniform to get her mother's attention." Mama Momo. What does it mean to put a bun in an oven? Are they talking about bread?"

Now realizing what she meant, Momo began going beet red and trying to make a reasoning behind what she said. "Th-they're talking about Mei having a baby."

"Oh. Then where do babies come from?"

"W-well you see Eri. B-babies are umm...well they're...." Trying to think of something off the spot, the dark haired woman saw a bird chirping outside. "THEY COME FROM BIRDS! A magical stork brings them to mommies and daddies that love each other very much!"

"In the form of seeds being spread." Mineta began laughing at his joke before getting hit over the head by Shoko holding a giant piece of ice.

"Babies come in eggs?"

'DAMMIT, MINETA! I WAS ABLE TO FIX THIS BEFORE YOU BUTTED IN!' Momo was enraged with the small perverted classmate of theirs before continuing. "W-well what Mineta means is, babies are given as seeds and born in the ground. When the seeds are planted, they grow into big watermelons. When the watermelons are ripe after nine months of growing, they make a baby." 'Please work. Please work. Please work.'