The Winter Cowboy || Bucky x Reader

Epilogue

One year later

It took one year. One year before you finally heard word of Bucky after he had left for Wakanda. You had played the voicemail that he had left hundreds of times by now. You would often play it when you weren't able to fall asleep or when you felt alone. "Doll. T-they- fixed me. They- listen, I don't have long. There's a fight coming and they need me. I'll come home to you soon. I promise."

But Bucky hadn't come back to you. He had unwillingly broken his promise and left your soul in a million pieces. The burden of losing both Bucky and Harper in the blip had been the hardest thing you had ever had to deal with in your life. The grief felt desperately deep, and you soon found yourself endlessly inconsolable. Ultimately, you had found a way to cope by working late into the nights and shutting yourself off from the world on endless long hikes with Staples. It was the loneliest you had ever felt. Your brother, Carter, returning from duty meant he was able to help around the farm more, meaning you had more spare time to spend alone. Your parents were heartbroken with losing their youngest daughter, causing your father's back issues to finally catch up with him and leave him a heaping stubborn mess. They retired to a small home closer to town, leaving you all alone in that big house which had usually been filled with so much chaos and laughter. You missed the smell of your mother's morning cooking; you missed the way your father would secretly pretend you were a son instead of his daughter; you missed Harper finding all the ways in which she could thwart your parents and sneak out of the house; you missed Bucky's eyes finding yours as everyone sat at the breakfast table; the way he would smirk when you put syrup on bacon. You had never realized that it was the little things in life that made it worthwhile.

Four years later

It took four more years for the world to erupt into chaos once again. Though your emotional wounds had healed over, they were still scars that felt painful at times. The only thing of Bucky you still carried with you was one of the two dog tags he had draped around your neck before he got on the jet that had taken him to Wakanda. In the back pocket of his jeans, you pushed a photo of you and Bucky dancing at the Chokecherry Dance in the barn. On the back you had written out a quote from LesMisérables. Your words had failed you as you and Bucky said goodbye to each other: because how could you possibly put into words all that you felt for that stubborn grumpy man in a fleeting moment? It simply could not be expressed into words, even if you had till infinity to do so.

Then, five years after you had last seen him, Harper appeared out of the blue while you were prepping the barn for an upcoming wedding. Your world turned upside down. Years of grief and loneliness washed off of your shoulders as you hugged Harper so hard until you felt your ribs were going to crack. It was the first time you had truly smiled in years.

Harper's return brought on an endless array of festivities that sent your entire family into one of the happiest periods they had ever experienced. And, as you watched you parents hug Harper again for the first time in years, your mind turned to Bucky Barnes and the promise he had made to you five years ago. No one talked of sergeant Barnes, but their eyes were still asking without a word passing their lips. But you weren't sure. You wondered if, had he truly been freed of the Winter Soldier, whether he would still be the same person. What if the Winter Soldier had been so deeply rooted in his mind, that he was the one who had fallen in love with you, not Bucky Barnes himself? So, despite the deep longing and hope buried deep inside your heart, you focussed on your family- on finding yourself again.

Two months later

You sighed in relief as you removed the high heels you had been wearing for the party, welcoming the glorious flat wooden floor of the barn. The last wedding guests were finishing their drinks and packing up to leave for home. Your brother had married a fellow soldier called Melanie, whom he had met while he was on active duty on the other side of the world. She had fit into the family like a glove. Gorgeous as she was, she didn't struggle handling her drink and looked like a total badass driving the largest military tanks out there. Your father seemed particularly excited to have someone to talk war with again. You wondered if he had ever talked with Bucky like that, assuming Bucky would have ever been in a talkative mood with anyone but you. You smiled softly as you imagined your father and Bucky discussing the ridiculousness of the automatic weaponry being produced nowadays.