In Volume 4 of the Indie Musician's Diary I write about how and why music creation had to take a one year breather as I started to write the book that explains my first album, (The Change My Mind book). My planned, second album, "Abide", was put on...
Some times I'm tempted to scream. I have had one heck of a Spring. If it wasn't one thing it was something else eating at my time. If you have been following me you know that somewhere after I released my second Swedish song in late February I haven't released anything else because of many "setbacks". In this chapter of the Indie Musician's Diary (Volume 4!), I hope to encourage you about those times when you have had a long string of bad things or distracting things happen to you and you want to get back on track making your music. Here we go.
Examples of recent setbacks
So what happened so time flew like a rocket? I'll go first. It's a long list but I'll share the main points. The one I most vividly remember (because it was painful), was when I was about to drink some newly brewed tea and the handle fell off allowing boiling hot water to flow all over my thighs. (I am o.k.)
I was at a cow release event, standing on some hay, watching the cows run out to pasture and jump for joy, when some cow fleas took a liking to me. The bites were awful and got infected so I had to care for them for a month. (I still have scars all over my stomach!)
During this three month war, I was cleaning my bathroom when my cell phone flew out of the side pocket of my sweater into the toilet, forcing me to replace it with a new one. This forced me to login anew with passwords, find and add relevant contacts and renew my bank ID at an office more than an hour from my home. Then, just a few days later, my Macbook Pro battery died (for the third time), and I was not able to mix music for a full week. I had to move all my licenses and plugins and leave it off to the laptop doctor. He found that a plate was missing and that my Mac was in great condition, (after replacing the battery). It is 8 years old and I was glad to hear that it is tip top!
Now there are two men sawing and hammering above my studio - there are a few holes in the roof above my bed (the room next to my studio. I've had to move everything out of the room or cover things with a tarpaulin just in case they miss plugging a hole -as the rain clouds move in....does it ever end?
On top of all that, or underneath it, depending on how you look at it, I've also had the usual family stuff (which is important and dear to me), and all the practical stuff that must be done like cleaning, shopping and so on. They both got the rest of my time or the best of my time...for months. The in-laws' lawn needs mowing often and their rain spouts needed cleaning and I have to drive them to the store every other week. And, I just have to see my new grandchild, (a real cutie!), and hang out with my adult kids too in Denmark which is over an hour away. (I wish I lived closer!)
So, I have not had any time or energy over to mixing music more than a few hours a week. You kind of get out of momentum when you spend less than two hours a day mixing IMHO. And I switched over to writing my book on my husband's laptop while mine was in the shop being fixed.
Before all this "struck" I had three songs I was to release before summer but now I see that I might be able to release, at best, one song a month all summer long: Jesus I Love You (in June); Seek Truth (in July) and God Loves Rock n Roll in August. At least that is the plan until I run into more setbacks. (You never know what's coming!)
It's all about attitude!
Earlier in my life I would get angry and frustrated and maybe even throw a tantrum after having so many roadblocks hit me within such a short period of time. But now I just roll with the punches and remain thankful. I've made up my mind that life is like this- ups and downs - and the setbacks won't last forever, so why waste time being angry or frustrated. I decided early on to save my energy and look for the positives in the middle of the mess and get going again as soon as the fog dissipates.
So that is what I am doing. Today, I am starting to get into the automation of the background vocals on the song Jesus I Love You. I have found some problems pop up and adjusted them as I went along and then back to the automation. The plan is to release the 1st of three songs within a few weeks. But the main thing is that it has to sound great before I release it- or that it sounds at least as good as I can do for now. I'm still working on trying not to over edit, over work and over think my mixes. They can drag a mix down and create unnecessary setbacks that are within my control on top of all the others I can't control.
Deadlines are flexible only if the setbacks are massive.
I am setting a final date for sending it for distribution through CDBaby - June 10th. I think it is important to set deadlines. Of course, I might get something thrown at me that might make it impossible, but after looking at my calendar and all the responsibilities I have the next two weeks, this seems like a reasonable deadline. So unless the sky falls down or the creeks rise I'm now shooting for sending it away on June 10th.
Be of good cheer - you are not alone!
So if you are a musician/songwriter/producer and you feel this, know that you are not alone! Please give yourself a hug. The punches won't last forever. You can do this! Just keep on going! It may feel impossible right now but keep trying and you'll get a week or two where things just "click" and you're into the flow again.
Try to look at the bright side of life. I did. I now have a new beautiful cellphone, a computer that works like a charm, my scars are healing, I didn't get burned by the tea. Also, my in-laws are precious and thankful, my grandson is growing like a weed and is cute as a button and I'll see him (within my planning on Monday). Life is good. Yes, it's up and down and all around. Music is not the most important thing. People are. Relationships are. Shit happens. Pull yourself up when it does and look on the bright side of life always!
Life is full of punches- even for musicians. You just have to learn to roll with them. Being a music creator is part of the package of being human. We all have bad days - days when setbacks occur, days when we want to give up or days when we get frustrated and lose our way. Just accept the fact that each setback is usually temporary and tell yourself that it's o.k. to be down temporarily. But don't let the setbacks crush you.
Look at the bright side. Look back and see the fact that you are courageous and can bounce back after each blow. Listen to your heart and take care of yourself. Just because you couldn't practice or mix like you wanted to doesn't mean you are a loser. Just get up again and keep going.
Take three deep breaths, smile and say to yourself, "This is going to be fun", before you sit at the computer again. I do. It always helps.
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Elisabeth Kitzing is a songwriter and music producer, videographer and blogger from New York, based in Sweden. She creates music for your soul and writes about life and how to keep your head above the water. You can catch her stuff at https://www.featherheadmedia.com
