Begin Again (Severus Snape/Student Love Story)

Chapter Twenty-One: Fear, Rage, and Fury

         I was falling. So fast that the wind rumbled in my ears, muffling my carnal screams. So fast that the cool night air pierced my skin like needles. So fast that the breath in my lungs was squeezed from my chest, making it impossible to inhale. The castle soared past me in an indistinguishable blur as the grounds grew closer and closer...

"IMMOBULUS!" I heard the unmistakable sound of Snape's voice bellowed frantically into the night and my scream caught in my throat, its echo vanishing into the dark as I came to a stuttered halt in midair.

And then, everything reversed. The earth fell further away, and the stars drew closer as Snape lifted me back up and into the safety of the castle and tenderly onto the floor.

'I am alive. I am alive. I am alive.' I had to repeat it to myself over and over as the swell of relief fought against the racing of my heart, trying to calm it down as I gasped for air. I was shivering uncontrollably.

Snape rushed over and knelt down in front of me, dark eyes meeting my glazed ones from between ebony curtains of long hair. If I didn't know any better, I would have questioned why there were now six of him.

His cloak was blanketed around him, a wall protecting me from the three horrible boys who still stood on the edge of the room in a petrified state – though from a spell or sheer terror I couldn't say. A mixture of fear and fury was etched into the hard lines of Snape's face. "You three," he said without turning to look at them, though it was obvious who he meant. "To your dormitory. Immediately. I will deal with your severe repercussions later," he said, tone absolutely dripping with wrath. The Slytherins scuttled off instantly without question, and as soon as the door closed behind them, the fury faded from his expression, leaving only the fear behind.

"Rowan, say something, please. Are you hurt?" He was huddled around me, one hand on my arm as his black eyes assessed for injuries. I thought he may have been trembling slightly, but I was tremoring so badly myself that I couldn't be certain.

"I... I don't think so. Dizzy. Shaken. And very, very damaged pride," I said, still unable to catch my breath as I hoisted myself to be seated upright against the wall. "The Cruciatus curse doesn't do any actual damage, right?"

"They used the Cruciatus curse?" he growled deeply.

"Goyle did," I said with a shudder. "H... How did you find me?"

"Nevermind that, what did they do to you? Tell me what happened. Everything." I could hardly believe how uncharacteristically distraught he seemed.

I swallowed a lump that was forming in my throat. "Well I was up here practicing the Patronus... I come here a lot to practice alone... and they'd been watching me. They knew I was alone so they cornered me. Maybe they'd been waiting for the right moment... waiting until no one... until they thought no one was around to hear. Goyle said... well, he said his dad saw us... me and you I mean... at the Leaky Cauldron back in August. He thought we were... I don't know, colluding about something? Planning something?"

The look in his eyes was unreadable as I repeated the ridiculous accusations. I continued. "He said he wanted to kill me and make his dad proud. I don't know if he thinks we're working with Vol- ... with You-Know-Who, or what he even suspects us of but – " My thoughts trailed off. I'd just remembered what Goyle said about my mom.

"But what?" he said promptingly.

"Goyle somehow knows... or thinks he knows... the Death Eater who killed my mom. He said something about 'the Carrow girl' finishing off my mom. I don't understand... " Another speculation occurred to me. "Professor, I know you don't think much of him, but Harry's had this theory all year that Malfoy's secretly a Death Eater. You don't think it's true, do you? I mean, how else would Goyle know who killed my mom? Malfoy must have told him."