The Summer Of Grey

Chapter 2

Chapter 2

School starts back up in a little over a month so hopefully I'll make some new friends in some of my classes this year. I'm not a very popular girl at school and not for any particular reason, I just keep to myself so I can't really blame anyone, I usually choose to sit alone unless someone sits at my table. I'm always nervous to just go sit at a full table because a few times I was told the seats were taken when clearly they weren't. School is tough enough for me emotionally so why make it harder than it has to be.

I am just very quiet unless it's somebody I know well, and right now that's pretty much nobody. I'm going to be a senior this year and I really want to make it memorable, but in a good way. The picture scandal could either send me back to social Siberia or have every guy at school in love with me. Hopefully it's the latter but I seriously doubt it.

I'm not the smarty pants book type at all and I'm definitely not the cheerleader type. I would say that I am just kind of average and blend in, and that seriously has to change. I have spent the past 3 years of high school alone at a lunch table with my iTunes. Sometimes I pretend to have my music on just so I can hear if kids are talking smack about me.

A few boys once sat at my table and said I was hot and they would do me if I wasn't such an anti-social freak .I just pretended not to hear but that was the moment I decided that I need to make a change , gradually, and I'm still a serious work in progress. Around my family I am very outgoing and even have a bit of a potty mouth. I think people would be surprised to hear how many expletives I can spit out in a day.

So here is my mini bio, my full name is Anastasia Rose Steele, my mom almost named me Peyton after the psycho lady from the movie "The hand that rocks the cradle". She said she watched it while she was in labor on the hospital TV , but my dad had his heart set on Anastasia after his great grandmother. I like my name but prefer Ana for short.

I'm 17 and will be 18 shortly. I have no big plans for being an adult as of yet and I'm pretty sure I'll be living home for a few more years while I go to college and get a job. This is my transition year, girl to woman and apart from my lack of social skills I am going to put forth my best effort to socialize and possibly have a date before the summer ends. I have already made a few subtle changes to my appearance since school has been out.

I lightened my hair a shade so now it's like a light sandy brown with some very subtle gold highlights. I thought it would look nice with my eye color which is a very light powdery blue but now I think I may go back to dark brown so my eyes really pop. That's a bit drastic so maybe I'll hold off for a while.

Style is another issue, my wardrobe makes me look too young for my age and I'd like to start looking more like a young woman than a little girl. I have also been dressing in more fitted clothing to show my curves. I have a pretty good body (which the whole school has now seen) just maybe a bit thin but my chest is a decent 32C, okay B, a full B.

Usually at school I hide my body underneath baggy clothes so I don't draw any attention towards myself especially my chest. No more baggy shit, it has to go. I am determined to have a boyfriend this year. I may be the only girl in High School who has been single all 3 years so far. That's pathetic!

I have dated a few guys but nothing serious just some really bad kisses and a few crappy dates. I've never even gotten close to saying farewell to my virginity! My mother is always trying to fix me up with one of her friends sons but that's too awkward having my mom play matchmaker. She's the one who needs a matchmaker. She's been divorced for 10 years and has only gone on a few dates.

One guy she dated for like 6 months but she broke up with him. She's really outgoing and goes out with her single friends all the time but she hasn't had a serious relationship for a while. I think she has a thing for my principal Mr. Chasing and I'm pretty sure he's into her, he always asks hows your mom with way too much curiosity. I'm not sure how I feel about that. It could be really weird if they started dating. I barely see my dad at all. He remarried and moved to Texas, he calls on birthdays and sends a check for the holidays. He texts me maybe once a month but it's getting less and less as I get older.

It's his loss if he wants to just dump his kids for a new family. He and his new 28 year old wife Brooke have a 2 year old son Cayden who I've never even met. I've asked him if I could visit to meet my new baby brother but he said he's busy with work. I got the message loud and clear. It really does hurt me and my two brothers Justin and Drew that we haven't met Cayden.

I 'am starting my senior year at South Spring High School here in hot and sunny New Tampa, FL. It is lightning capitol of the USA. I love the rain but I can do without the lightning. It only really rains a lot during the summer. Tampa is very pretty though, the beaches, the palm trees and the people and it's only an hour drive to Orlando to go to all the theme parks too.

This is the school year I waited for since I walked in to this hell hole as a freshman. Dreaming of senior prom with a beautiful boy on my arm, the most amazing head turning sparkly gown, a D.J, all the popular kids that I wanted so desperately to be best friends with, and of course me being elected prom queen.

Sadly that is so far from the reality I live in today. Even earlier this year I wanted my 17th birthday to be amazing but I had to succumb to the reality that it would be spent with Kate and my family at the Outback steakhouse. I had a great time with them and it was bittersweet because I won't see Kate for the next 2 or 3 years. My eldest brother Justin who now lives in NY was here too and I don't know when or if I'll get to spend another birthday with him anytime soon, so yeah it was a good birthday.

My brother Justin is 21 and he was very popular in school, every girl was in love with him and you guessed it he was prom king. He moved to NY with his girlfriend Ashley this past March and goes to college there, he did 2 years at a community college here Tampa thats where he met Ashley and is now studying at NYU, he is so smart. He is eventually going to be a Lawyer, but for now he works in a Hollister as the assistant manager but plans to leave within a year and hopefully get an internship at a law firm. We have always gotten along really well and he has always been very protective of me even when he went through a very rough time a few years ago. He was big into partying and it was very out of control at home for a while.

My younger brother Andrew, Drew for short, named after my late grandpa turned 16 in March so we are around a year apart. We fight sometimes but mostly he's fun to hang out with and has some seriously hot friends. Seriously I'm waiting for one of those friends to accidentally sleep walk into my room one Saturday night!

Drew has already has had a few girlfriends and one was kind of serious but he is single right now and constantly talks about sex and how much he gets its. He's exaggerating a bit but I've seen a few girls come out of his room looking a little sweaty (eeewww). I always think of those girls as skanks or sluts even though I'd really like to have my own boyfriend to get me all sweaty and worked up.

I mean I'm not completely hideous looking, I'm kind of cute really. I'm just socially awkward (or shy) that's what keeps people away from me I think. I am too quiet. I know I purposely ugly myself up a bit just to keep people away. I wish I could be more like my brothers. I'm not going to hide anymore. I am going to sit with kids at lunch, make small talk, join a club, whatever it takes to put myself out there and have a social life. Er..I'll try my best. I would also like a boyfriend and maybe sex, sex would be good.

Thanks for reading xo