Cognitive Dissonance

Chapter 7: Waltz

Jason knew even before he asked that he wasn't going to get a thank you. But he decided that's okay. It's not like he truly wanted to help her. He just happened to have good reflex. That's what years of martial arts training and storing rage does to people.

It's been a while since the famed billionaire industrialist took him in. The man gave him shelter, food, and everything anyone could ask for. Bruce Wayne literally gave him all there was to give. And then some.

Some were the things Jason didn't ask for but believed he needed. He took what was handed to and is available to him like alms to a beggar. The funny thing is, it's just a tiny bit off from what he actually did before all the luxury.

His real father taught him thievery when he was much younger -- something he started to willingly do when his father got sent to jail -- allowing him to learn the entirety of Gotham like the back of his hand. He did it to survive not only himself but his mother too. He ended up losing both parents eventually.

The father died while in prison. The mother overdosed from her drug addiction. Jason wasn't so sure how to feel when he lost both parents. It wasn't as if he felt he had a family even when they were alive. He can only remember them arguing and fighting with each other all the time.

Jason didn't see the difference of having a family and being an orphan. He didn't have the time to mull over it and grieve. All he was sure of was that he's hungry and had to eat. Stealing became a full-time thing.

Bruce found him like so. He tried to take a tire from the man's car. But instead of handing him over to the police, the man took him in. Helped him in more ways than one.

It didn't take long before Jason was equipped with things no ordinary person could achieve in such a short time. He was poor, but he is smart and fit. And he learned all what Bruce taught him. Be it academic subjects -- which he later continued in school -- or athletic skills, he did them well.

The confidence in his strides is not innate. It is a product of diligence he didn't know he had. He looked up to Bruce, and looked up to Dick some more. His every movement a mirror of their current. One leads and the other takes the same steps. Jason has always been the latter. And he was fine with that.

"I don't really care how you're feeling but are you okay?" Rachel finally asked to break the ice.

When she told him he didn't deserve her gratitude because it was his fault for following in the first place, the two of them quietly made their way back to their rooms. And while she knows she has no grasp of who Jason Todd truly is, she can sense there's something off with him. Again, he is elsewhere. But this time, he seemed far gone than before, that she took it upon herself to speak to him.

"What? You think I'd be miserable without your thank you?" Jason responded, too quickly for his own liking. He mentally gave himself a smack on the head for having a mouth that speaks before he can even think. That, or he thinks way too fast and acts accordingly in the same fashion.

"Why did I even ask?" Rachel said, rolling her eyes. It was more due to the fact that she said it out loud than a reaction to his response. She didn't need a lot of time to know he wasn't the type who would respond nicely.

Jason shrugged to answer her question, a smirk plastered on his face. "Thanks sunshine," he said as he pushed the door to his room open. "For walking me to my room," he finished with a wink.

What the actual fuck?

After that night, the week saw Jason Todd nowhere to be found. It wasn't really in Rachel's best interest to find out where he is. Him gone meant she will have a peaceful time.

Too peaceful for her liking.

"Off the table Master Jason," Alfred instructed as he made a shooing motion with his hand. Instead of following through the request though, Jason who was earlier sitting on the table, now lay on it.

"Shocking! Now why didn't I know you will be like that?" The old man said in act of placing the metal tray with cloche lid cover on Jason's chest. The youngest master of the house instinctively sat up, and pushed the tray away not knowing how hot it actually is.

"What the shit!?" he bellowed, "Fucking hell!" he continued spouting profanities after profanities. He finally got off the table still fanning his hand.

Alfred then placed the tray on the table. "What's in it?" Jason asked, looking at the butler with feigned scorn. He might hate a lot of things and most people but Alfred Pennyworth isn't one of them.

"But of course, your favorite!" Alfred delightedly said opening the lid with mittened hands. From where Rachel stood -- she stopped on her tracks by the entrance to the dining area -- she can see Jason's face dance. It's the first time she's seen him more animated and carefree during her stay. Not that she ever saw him frequently during the past week. This is in fact just her third day encountering him.

Rachel would also take note that Alfred called him by his first name. The butler and the master seem close and it shows. With all the peace and quiet she got after the night she last met him, the view before her sure is a fresh sight. She was sort of relieved to see Jason apparently okay. Even if she was pissed at him and didn't want to have anything to do with him. At this point, she can't tell what she actually wants.

"There's nothing in it," Jason commented, obviously perplexed. The tray is empty save for a towel emitting steam. "Exactly. Just like we haven't seen you for a week, it was as if you evaporated," Alfred said.

Dinner had been a fairly quiet affair. There were just a few exchange of words between the brothers. A comment from Alfred here and there. And a rare interruption from Rachel.

The succeeding days were the same. At least for the only guest in the house. The only significant observation she's made is that of Jason's worsening appearance. Bags have definitely formed under his eyes. His face now thinner and sharper on the jaws.

She was wrong. He is without a doubt not fine at all. Jason Todd could have fooled her with his easy demeanor if only she wasn't observant just like she is at this very second. Something is going on with Dick's brother and none of the people in the manor seem to notice.

No one would hear it from Jason but he has detected a recurring pattern in Rachel Roth's behavior the past few days. From his periphery, he can see her copy his movement. As to whether she's aware of it or not, he can't tell yet.

Intentionally, Jason played with the food on his plate. This is the first time he deliberately made an action to see how she would react. Like he predicted, it didn't take long for her to mimick him. She too is currently pushing a cut piece of artichoke here and there on her plate.

Once doesn't really prove anything so he decided to show her another act. He placed his elbow on the table and rubbed his nape with his hand, all the while, responding to something Dick just said. A minute later, she was doing the same thing.

All his life, Jason had always taken the steps someone before him took. He never really had an option even if he made it seem like he has. He danced to the beat of the unforgiving universe, barely managing to endure the seemingly easy waltz through life. It never crossed his mind there will come a time that he will be leading the sway.

Yet, as he placed his fork down on the table and excused himself, he knew, the music started.