Finding Her

Finding Her: Chapter Two

"Do you want coffee?" Eve muttered to Pam who had sat in the cleanest seat she could find, "Do you have coffee?" Pam said as she looked around the dingey and messy apartment. Eve looked through the cupboards and after a while replied with a blunt "no", "I'll take a water then please" Eve grabbed the cleanest glass she could see from the drying rack and ran it under the tap not waiting to see if it was cold. She placed it down next to Pam, threw some clothes off a chair and slumped down in front of her. There was an awkward silence for at least a minute. "How have you been" Pam began, but she was interrupted "why are you here?" Eve asked, tears swelling in her eyes, she didn't think she'd ever have to talk about Villanelle again and now there was something she needed to know about her?

Pam took a deep breath and placed a white envelope on the table. The envelope was addressed to Eve in a familiar handwriting, she cast her mind back to the first few weeks of their knowing one another, to that note. It was the same elegant font. Eve was frozen in shock, what kind of a sick game was this? Was this even her? If it was, why had she given this letter to Pam? She felt sick, her mind whirled. "Are you okay?" Pam's voice echoed in the back of Eve's mind, suddenly she felt a hand touch hers... "Do you need a drink?" Pam said as she pushed the glass towards Eve. Eve wiped away tears from her cheeks and cleared her throat "I need something stronger than that" she said and stormed out of her chair to raid her practically empty cupboards. Finding nothing, she reluctantly returned to the chair and stared into Pam's eyes. "How did you get this?" she asked, her eyes began to fill with tears again, "She gave it to me." Pam answered "When?" Eve said, desperate for information. "When you and Carolyn were talking, we played darts, I told her what had happened to Konstantin, her face dropped and then she  pulled it out of her pocket and gave it to me" Eve had barely been able to look at the letter in the short time she'd known about it. She began to wonder why Villanelle had written a letter, she didn't dare to think about its contents but why not send an email? If she was here, Eve would've called Villanelle "Overdramatic" and they would have bickered over the effect of sending a letter instead of a simple text. That's all she wanted, a text: 'Still Alive. X', that's all she needed, at least that's what she thought.

"Have you read this?", Pam looked up from where she had previously been hiding from Eve's gaze, "No" she said with a slight tone, she was offended that Eve would even think that. If she was being truly honest with herself, she had definitely thought about reading it. What was it that Villanelle couldn't possibly say out loud? She hoped that Eve would invite Pam to read it with her but she wouldn't be offended if she didn't want to share, well maybe a bit. She was sure she would find out eventually. "Are you going to open it?" Pam asked cautiously, hoping not to offend. Eve didn't know what to say, she knew she had to open it at some point and that this point should probably be sooner rather than later. But something held her back. Once she opened that letter, she might know for sure that Villanelle was gone. Before the letter she had sometimes hopefully wondered if Villanelle had some sort of trick up her sleeve, a final move, was this it? She didn't dare think about it, she wouldn't allow the excitement she felt over the letter to take control, because if it did, and it turned out it actually was Villanelle saying goodbye, then she'd have to go through the pain all over again.

Pam had sat patiently waiting for an answer. She could see Eve's mind collapsing in on itself as she tried to wrap her head around this situation. She didn't know what this situation was, she wished she did, she wanted to help Eve so badly. But all she knew was that Villanelle wanted Eve to read this letter, so she was going to make sure she did. She took a deep breath in "Eve, you need to read it, it's what she wanted." Eve froze, Pam was terrified she was about to be eviscerated. But instead, Eve looked at her and silently nodded. Something she had said just then had flicked a switch in Eve's brain. It was what Villanelle wanted, Eve needed to do this for her. Saying nothing, Eve picked up the pristine white envelope, caressed her name as if it were written with Villanelle's very essence, and cautiously, so as not to cause any tears, pulled out a neatly folded piece of paper...

End of Chapter Two :)

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