Love Under Duress

If You Want It To Be

Pairing: Carter/Fraiser
Warning: DADT mention

Janet was saying something, sitting on the edge of her desk, though Sam wasn't really paying attention to the words.

She hummed and nodded at intervals from where she stood a mere two feet away, but she was more focused on Janet's voice than the meaning. It was pretty, her voice that is. Sam had found she thought a lot of things about Janet were pretty. Her eyes, her hair, her lips. Sam knew she'd felt some attraction to women throughout her life, but she never talked about it to anyone, never dated a woman, never kissed one. She wanted to, though, and badly. One specific woman, the one sitting right in front of her.

One of Janet's hands was resting in the corner of the desk, to steady herself, and the other was in the air, gesturing around as she spoke. Janet's feet weren't on the ground, they were swinging around a bit in the air, which Sam noticed and found cute. She surveyed Janet's clothes, her usual button-up and long white coat. She flicked her eyes up to Janet's hair, which she found herself wishing she could run her hands through, and finally back down to her face.

Janet was a pretty woman, her eyes sparkling and lips curved up into a smile. In Sam's opinion, she seemed to be the most beautiful woman in the world. Sam found herself drawn closer, and Janet stopped talking. She looked up at Sam in confusion, and Sam leaned forward, meeting their lips together. Janet gasped a bit, surprised at the suddenness of the kiss, and in her shock, forgot to kiss back. Sam quickly broke the kiss, her expression apologetic, before quickly turning to fear.

"I'm sorry," she choked out, backing away, "I didn't mean- I didn't- I'm sorry, I shouldn't have- I should go." Janet quickly stood up and grabbed her arm before she could make her way to the door, cutting her off, "Sam! Sam, wait!" Sam looked away, panicking, "No, no. I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. I didn't mean to." She tried to work her way out of Janet's grasp, but Janet pulled her into her arms, knowing that she'd be afraid of Janet being angry, "Calm down Sam. I'm not angry, I'm not going to tell anyone. It's ok, Sam." Sam noticeably relaxed, although she was still a bit skittish.

"Here," Janet said, pulling her over to a set of chairs by the wall, and forcing Sam to sit down in one of them. "I won't get angry, okay?" she said, "Just tell me the truth." Sam sighed, averting her eyes, "Ok, I did mean to. I'm sorry, I should've done that without asking you." Janet only smiles at her, taking both of Sam's hands in her own. "Look at me, Sam," she says, and Sam obliges, taking the chance to look into Janet's eyes again. "It's okay. I'm not angry," Janet repeats, knowing that Sam is scared of what could happen if Janet was that kind of person.

Sam relaxes, looking down at their intertwined hands. "Sam, do you have romantic feelings for me?" Janet asks, knowing the answer already. Sam nods, "Yes, I'm sorry, I-" Janet shushes her, "No, you've got nothing to be sorry for."

Janet continues, "Sam, I have romantic feelings for you too." Sam looks up in surprise, "You- You do?" Janet nods, a kind smile on her face. "And I quite liked that kiss," she says, "Would you mind continuing it?" Sam blushes, "Oh, yes! Sorry, I'm such an idiot." Janet gives her a look, and she leans forward, their lips meeting again. This time Janet kisses back, and she releases one of Sam's hands to curl her own around the woman's neck. When they finally break the kiss, both their faces are flushed.

"So, is this a thing?" Sam asks, referring to the two of them. Janet smiles, "If we want it to be. I do. What about you?" Sam hesitates, "But with 'don't ask, don't tell'..." She trails off. Janet rolls her eyes, taking Sam's other hand again and looking into her eyes, "Sam, we both work at the SGC. I'd wager we're both pretty good at keeping secrets." Sam nods, "Yeah, yeah, you're right. Ok, I want it to be."

"Then it is," Janet said, moving as close as she possibly could without digging into the arms of the chairs. "Janet, can I kiss you again?" Sam asks, and Janet only smiles, leaning in again to meet Sam's lips. Sam smiled into the kiss, her brain empty of thoughts except for one: she should've done this a long time ago.