Nada's Escape: Fighters' lies

19.2 Conscript

The council is arrayed again in the meadow. At the front stands Josef, my father.

"This is a bit unorthodox, but... " My father says. He passes down a piece of paper. I hear it fall through the air from his fingers to mine.

"Memorise this."

I scan the words, swallowing back nerves.

"What is it?" I ask.

"Don't- ask questions. Just do it." Auctoritas rumbles under his words, giving me a headache.

I mumble through the words, uncomfortable with the way they feel in my mouth. As the last phrase rolls from my tongue I realise the syllables themselves are sticky, like half-chewed toffee.

The black ribbon slips itself around my wrists, as though it has a life of its own. Wait, I think, I don't know if I want to do this. But they're all watching me. I open my mouth, sealing my fate.

"You know who I'm talking about." I shut my eyes to squeeze the council from my mind. "From this day on, she's the one I swear to protect."

I feel the oath beginning to form around me, invisible strands of energy coalescing. They brush against my skin, a warm touch, the kiss of a campfire's heat.

"Beat for beat, her soul strength becomes my soul. Back to back, we'll crush each nightmare. Breath for breath, I'll take her hand through the night and at each dawn we'll dream as one. Lung, limb, heart, together as one."

The final words feel like honey on my tongue. The oath settles into my skin like filaments of liquid fire. I watch as the ribbon ties itself, not into a bow but an ordinary knot. Simple. The oath sinks deeper still, winding though my bloodstream, burning with passion, inspiration. It should be too hot, but it's not. It's enlivening.

Something tugs on the ribbon, dragging me through the gardens, then up and over the wall of Camp Seven. I blink, looking through the grate into Seven's main hall. A tangle of girls boils there, but I'm only here for one.

***************************************

At first I'm just scared. I'm staring down, avoiding everyone, trying to pull my thoughts together. It doesn't matter... I look up from concrete floor slowly. Underneath my lashes I'm startled to find him so close and flinch compulsively. Then my scared eyes meet his flecked hazel ones and I'm not so afraid anymore.

Somewhere inside I know this is a dream, but that sensation of knowledge is fleeting. Instead I am sucked into my younger body, feeling every bit of that cloying terror from my first days in Seven. The dream turns kind, though, and I welcome the change, the memory somehow not tainted by the years of strife separating us.

Although we are in the middle of the big hall, with most of Seven's residents staring at us unabashed I can't look away. I'm caught in a bubble with him; so close that our noses are almost touching. His eyes are a multiplex of colour; brown, green, blue, yellow in a hundred tiny flecks. They sparkle with youth and kindness.

I feel a conduit blossom between us, a silvery connection opening to let a flood of light into my darkest corners. Tastes and smells and sounds roll over me in waves. Emotions, I realise, a conversation beyond words. I feel myself babble that awful collection of fears and anxiety into the world between us. They muddy the silvery connection a moment, so great is my malaise.

But he listens. And understands every thought that passes me by. The darkness fades to leave only the feeling of a warm embrace. Comforting, even without a touch from him. I'm still lost, drinking in his face like an elixir of life.

We've all heard talk about kindred spirits but until this tiny, beautiful moment I'd never understood. We are exactly in sync, every breath both seen and heard and felt. My soul aches from what I've been through, and somehow he knows how to share his with mine.

We stay there like that for a while, I don't know how long. There in the middle of the hall. But I don't notice the noise or the heavy stares. It's just me and him in our bubble. Untouchable.

He smiles a bit seeming to say there, that's better. All I manage is a funny twitch of my lips; but that's something. Somethings can be important.

After a beautiful eternity, he speaks, whisper-soft, "I'm Finley." I barely hear the sound of the words but inexorably my core begins to fill with liquid gold.

"Nada," I mouth back, my eyes still locked unerringly to his. He smiles a little brighter.

A dirty hand followed by a screen of dull brown hair breaks that wondrous connection with a hurtful snap. It's like stretching a rubber band and feeling all of that potential energy come slamming back into your hand. A little gasp escapes my lips from the sting.

"And the freaky trance is broken!" Says the owner of the hand like the ringmaster of her circus. Her large, almost black eyes are right before my own, invading that special bubble of warmth.

She continues in a tone that suggests she thinks herself a grand hero, "He was brain washing you, you know. But don't worry," She gives me a double pat on the check and turns to face her rather large audience. "Jayne is here to save you from them."

With a flick of her head she makes it quite clear that Finley and the other newcomers are the ghastly them. Movement fills the room as the fighters start an all-out brawl to get at Finley. A chant starts up, "Save you, save you, save you!" I am more terrified than before.

"We'll talk later," he says at my ear and but I'm too afraid of the ruckus in front of me to risk taking my eyes from it.

The dream unravels around me then, past and present mixing like dye dropped in water. I'm speaking to myself, proclaiming my truth to the world like a preacher.

When Finley came back into Seven I hadn't been so happy to see him anymore. Jayne had been harsh but she taught me a few things. Like the fact that Finley was part of the group that took me and was imprisoning me. That everything I'd felt with Finley had been enthralment. A lie. A manipulation. A betrayal.