Keep Going

the memories

Vee pov

After so many years finally I found mark and he seating beside me. Actually at first I want to mad at him but I don't know, I can't, my feeling is still the same like before, it's hurt when mark left me but when I see him again my anger to him is like bubble in a one blink is gone.

I want to know the real reason why he left me easily, his gone for too long ,
I think I deserve explanation.
But seeing mark like this I could get enough energy to ask him more.
He's not feeling well , he's not good condition he fucking sick.

Until now mark didn't moving from lead on on my chest. And my hand still on his shoulder. My mark hugging me tightly he said he miss me so much, of course I miss him more,

Veeee
He called me

Hmm

Are you mad at me right? He ask me

Of course mark , I'm very mad at you I answer but in law voice.

He Laugh a little

Why you laughing? Didn't you believe that I mad at you? I ask him

You not good at lying vee mark said.

I let go mark and I hold his both shoulders and facing to me.

Mark I mad at you, you leave me you left me alone my tears fall down to my cheeks I can't stop falling my tears even I don't want to cry I want to brave but I can't I'm weak for mark. Mark is my strong but mark is also my weakness.

He all for me that's why when he leaving me, I'm no one.

Mark smile to me and he wiped a tears from my cheeks.

I know vee but I know you, you still love me right? I love you the most, you know I want to come to you but I can't, look at me how can I face to you if I'm like skeleton. I'm not like before I'm not mark like handsome before I'm not mark who can play all sports and instruments. I'm weak mark now.

Now some of my memories are gone I don't remember some of our memories vee . mark said

he really weak even he just talk he really tired.

I hug him again

Ok it's ok I can wait more I will wait until you are healed mark I said to him.

Sorry vee but I think I don't have time left.
But before that I want to say that I really love you.
Vee if I left you again I hope you open this to some who appreciates you being Vee or Yin please open this ( he pointed my heart) to someone who love you so much, the person who give his time for you. Vee you deserve to be loved. If that person come please accept him, like you accept me. Vee maybe I'm not the one who destiny to you in this life. Maybe we meet to teach each other how to be strong. Maybe I'm the only way for the person to fine you. Mark said

Mark you talk so much I said

Vee do you remember when I always mad at you? When you always lose your temper on me.? But you always first reconciled to me even I'm the one wrong .

Yeah I remember you always have sour face everytime I play football ball I said with sulking

Hahaha mark laughing

Of course I'm gonna mad at you that time you fucking annoying vee, You always take off your jersey out of nowhere flexing your body to everyone mark said

I laughed out loud

Why are you laughing? Mark said

Are you jealous? Hahaha you so cute I said and pinch his cheek.

Ouch mark rub his cheek

Do you know all girl wanted to eat you they like crazy shouting to you thier eyes almost pop out they are almost drooling over your body. And then you enjoying flexing your body mark said he mad but he cute now I know why he always sulking that time.

Yeah how about you ? You too you like showing your bod too. Mark remember you are swimmer you always no shirt. I said sulking

Of course I don't wear shirt it's a swimming. It's different for you ok. Mark said

Wow what a different? All people want you not only girl all over the campus even at outside all of them like you I said.

But now I think no one like me. Mark said

What no one? What do you think of me? I like you the most I love you the most only you mark. I said in my highest voice

He laughed again

You know vee what I learned from this
Leaving you?

What?

I made a big mistake, I hurt you. He starting to cry.
I hurt the most person I love.
Im wrong for not trusting you.
I'm wrong for not telling you
I'm wrong for not asking help for you
I'm wrong to keep my problem alone
I'm wrong to hide all my pain by my self.
All what I do is wrong vee.

I learned not everything I can do alone.
Not all problem I can handle
Not all pain I can hide to my self alone.

I learned sometimes with need a person to lead on if we are tried we need the person who always want to listen to all your problem the person who willing to share pain with you. And
I'm late to realize the person who always there ready to listen to me , the person I can tell everything the person who ready to fight for me but still I tell to that person because Im scared I'm coward I don't have brave to tell everything.

And that person is you Vee the only person who always there for me.

I fucking wrong and I really hate my self. I want to be strong to fight this. I want to fight my love for you.

All of this is my mistake. I didn't trust anybody even you, I don't believe anybody even you,

I'm really really sorry vee I hope all of this will done soon because I'm really tried vee I want to rest, I want to be free for all of this pain. Mark said

I just listened to all what he said
Yes he was wrong to not tell me everything his problem,
yes he was wrong to not trusting me.
Yes He was wrong to not giving me chance to help him.
But I realized I'm also wrong I didn't see he has difficult situation
I didn't see he was in pain even we always together I didn't see he was stress to his problem
I was wrong to not asking him ,
I'm was wrong to being coward.
I'm scared if I asked him he getting mad at me.

This is the most mistake to our relationship. We don't have profer communication . All of this happen because we only believe that "at least we love each".
But I realized love is not enough to stay in relationship.
Not only love but also need to build with trust and the most important is profer communication to each other if only love your partner without trust and communication your relationship will not stay longer like will happen to me with mark .

.....
Author
How a it's?
Ok this is short chapter again
Short memories with Veemark and learned what they mistake

They said practice makes perfect but nobody perfect so why practice Sometimes mistake can learn how to be better. But sometimes mistake is the most painful part to our life so think not only 1 or 3 before do anything because if is late we never returned.

I want to finish this story before love mechanics aired.

Next chapter is mark pov

Again sorry for wrong grammar and spelling

Thank you and see you for next chapter