The mountains we climb [ShiItaSasu] AU

Part 9, a start

Just moving things along-

***

"I know I'm being selfish, unfair and hypocritical. You don't have to tell me. I am in no position to be asking this of you, but I am." Narrowing his eyes, Itachi sighed. "It's a ridiculous request, I know."

"It's not as ridiculous as you think," Shisui put his feet on the coffee table, leaning against the backrest of the sofa. "I'm just surprised by how fast this happened. I was betting on another couple of months of you swallowing your pride, if I'm honest."

"What I said to Sasuke was the truth,"

"I know, you felt like that at the time, but jealousy is not something you can plan around. I should know,"

"I shouldn't be asking this of you, but I don't see a way forward like this. I don't know how you or Sasuke were able to handle this situation so well a year ago. Seeing you one time made me completely lose control over myself."

"He wasn't handling it at all, either. Have you already forgotten how much he was acting out? Itachi, although it was a very appealing idea, it should have stayed that. An idea. It was never going to work. I knew that. It's why I was trying to get the most out of it while it lasted." Itachi followed Shisui with his eyes as he watched him sit next to him. "Now, of course I wanted to be with you again. Just the two of us, or with him too. Frankly it didn't matter, as long as I was able to stay by your side."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't apologise. Over the years, I've learned to love you from the sidelines. I always knew that just because you were a big part of my life and I've learned so much from you over the years, doesn't guarantee that I am the one for you. I've made my peace with that. However, I can't let him go, I'm afraid." As Itachi opened his mouth, ready to argue, Shisui put up his arms in defence. "Not like that, I mean I won't fire him. I do need the help and he is doing his job well. I promise I'll keep it purely work related."

"I appreciate you being so calm about this, Shisui."

"Just spare me of the whole you'll make someone very happy one day speech, please." Laughing, he rubbed his face with his hands. "I'm drowning in work, and you still have to talk to Sasuke. You should get going." Getting up, Itachi was able to catch the faint shift in his expression as he was turning around. He wasn't as okay with the way things were as much as he tried to convince them both, but Itachi knew better than to try make it easier on him.

***

"I guess I just find it hard to believe, you know?" Sasuke stared at the ceiling of their bedroom as they laid on their bed, heads next to each other, feet on the opposite sides. "I mean, it almost feels like it's defeating the point? We've gone through so much. It feels like we wasted all that time, all those emotions,.. for nothing."

"It's not for nothing."

"I just think we would have arrived to this point either way, with or without going through what we did."

"Are you upset that I talked to Shisui?"

"Well,.." turning his head away from Itachi, Sasuke paused for a while. "It should have been a decision made by us both. You shouldn't have excluded me from it. Not just because it was him and I who were going through things, so if anything, it should have been me who talked to him, but I work with him, too, Itachi. It's going to be incredibly awkward now."

"I'm sorry, I let my jealousy get the better of me,"

"We really need to work on our communication, if this is going to work."

"You're right," sitting up on the bed, Itachi nodded his head. "You're absolutely right. So here's a couple of things I should have said when I noticed what was going on. I want your relationship with Shisui to stay purely work related. I want you to tell me if he tries something on you that's inappropriate. If he touches you in a way I would, I want you to quit the job. How is that for communicating?"

A smile spreading across Sasuke's lips, he supported himself on his elbows.

"It's a start."