Frenemies with benefits(boyxboy)

late night talk

TW: mentions of homophobia, bullying and death

Brian's POV:
I was sitting at a blue plastic chair, waiting for Will. I looked inside the door, into the infirmary. Will was talking to the school nurse. I could hear the low murmuring of their voices. Some place behind them, Chad was laying in a sofa. Chads tongue was bleeding, as the hit from Will made him bite his tongue. Luckily, he didn't bite it off. That would have been a disaster.

Will got out of the infirmary. "We can go now", he said. I nodded and got up. Will was already walking. I ran to catch up to him. "I'm going home", he said. I couldn't read his face, but his vibe was cold and closed off. His green eyes were intense and serious, and for the first time in forever he was kind of scary. I was torn between giving him space or hugging him. Instead, I tugged on the bottom of his shirt. That made him finally turn and look at me. I must have looked sad, because when he saw my face he gave me a tight hug. "Can I come with you?", I asked in a soft tone. "Of course", he breathed.

We were walking towards the parking lot, when I suddenly felt Will's hand wrap around mine. "What? People are gonna talk anyways", he answered to my shocked expression. I laced my fingers with his, enjoying the feeling. We got into his car, driving away from all the people and gossip.

"Will you be punished?", I asked when we were finally at his home. He was sitting on his bed, leaning against the headboard. I sat opposite to him, fiddling with the sheets. "I might get detention. Or worse, suspended", he said. I shook my head. "You shouldn't have done that", I said. Will's fists tightened around the sheets. "Just thinking about him makes me angry. I don't regret it", he said. "We're applying to colleges soon. You should be more careful", I complained. "I don't want to go to a fancy college", Will said. "I'll just follow you wherever you go", he said. "I've never really thought about it, but what do you want to study?", I asked. "To be honest, I want to be an elementary school teacher", he replied. "Shocking, I know", he smirked when he saw my reaction.

"Elementary school teachers have the power to change kids lives, for better or for worse. Maybe if I had a better teacher I would have been a better person today", he remarked. "You see, when I was in elementary and middle school, I got bullied", he said. I shifted. "Will, you don't have to tell me this if you don't want to", I said. He shook his head. "No, I want to. It's not an excuse, but it's and explanation for my behavior towards you and towards the world in general", he insisted. "I need to tell you, because I need to tell someone."

I nodded and crawled over to his side. I grabbed his hand and laces our fingers together. His palms were damp. His leg bounced in a nervous rhythm. "Take you're time, I'm listening", I told him. He nodded. "As I've mentioned, I was bullied throughout elementary school and middle school. It all started in fifth grade", he swallowed, and I watched his Adam's apple bounce.
"Up until then, I was pretty normal. I played sports with the boys, and I had zero interest in girls. None of us did. But things started changing. I kind of always knew that I wasn't interested in girls, but I figured I would. Adults seemed to think the same thing. It was healthy for boys to dislike girls. Cooties and all that", he sighted. "But I started realizing that I wasn't normal when all my friends started talking about girls, but all I could think about was boys."

I looked at his face, trying to show sympathy, but he was staring ahead, at the wall. "I didn't grow up in a very inclusive town when I was younger. It was a mostly white conservative christian town. And I mean, I am christian myself. But you know the kind of christian people I talk about. The one's who are more concerned about sin than kindness. And being gay was a big sin. It wasn't something to talk about. So when in fifth grade I asked my friends if it was weird if I liked guys, I wasn't exactly accepted. I didn't really understand what was wrong with me. But nobody wanted to talk to me anymore. It got worse in middle school. The rumors just kept growing until the entire town knew. People would avoid touching me, in case they got aids from me. Stuff like that. I was kind of getting used to being alone. It all got out of hand when I joined the football team. Most of the guys felt uncomfortable with me around, and I knew nobody liked me. I was excluded completely from the team."

"I'm sorry, that sounds horrible", I said. Will chuckled. "Well, as I said, it all got out of hand when I joined the team. More precisely, when our coach found me beat up, bleeding, alone in the showers. That's when we finally moved", he bitterly said. "I'm very glad we moved, but I still feel guilty. It wasn't easy for my dad to maintain his job when we moved, and he had to give up an amazing opportunity if he moved with us. So he bought an apartment to stay close to work, while my mom moved with me. She actually quit her job to take care of me. She works as a news anchor, but she quit the first year after we moved. She won't admit it, but I know it put a strain on their relationship. You see, mom and dad reacted very differently to the fact that I'm gay. My dad doesn't really care, I don't think he has ever cared about what I do. But mom was the one who signed me up for therapy and stuff. It wasn't anything serious though, don't worry. I was just a stupid kid, and in one of my breakdowns I said I wish I wasn't born or something. I talked to a therapist for two years though, I'm not suicidal or anything. But yeah, my mom started working again, so that's why my parents are never home", he explained.  

I was shocked. I couldn't believe Will went through all this. Behind his cool and collected attitude were painful memories I couldn't imagine he had. "I'm sorry Will, I had no idea you went through this", I said. "Don't be sorry, there's nothing you could have done", he said. I cuddled next to him, and he wrapped his arms around me. "Do you remember when we first met?", he asked. "Vaguely", I said. "I remember that I really wanted to be your friend, but you were so popular that I couldn't really get a word in with you. And suddenly I made everything into a competition." Will chuckled. "Well, actually, we met before that. I remember it was the first day of school, and my mom dropped me off at the parking lot. I was so nervous. I just wanted a fresh start. You saw that I was just standing in front of the school, so you approached me and said hi. And I was a total asshole. I stared at you and just walked away. After that, we got more hostile and mean to each other", he recalled. 

"Oh, now I remember!", I said. "That's why I didn't like you. I thought you were so cocky and rude, so I wanted to prove that I was better than you", I remembered. "Well, the truth is you were the most beautiful boy I had ever seen", Will said. "Stop", I gently hit his stomach. "No, I mean it", he said. I blushed and hit his arm. "You are so stupid", I complained. "I got a huge crush on you. And I was so afraid people would notice and realize I was gay. So I tried to stay away from you. I joined clubs and sports to get friends. But then I had like every single class with you. And you were on every single club. It was so hard to avoid you, I swear to God. You were like everywhere", he sighted. "I'm happy I could annoy you since day one", I smirked. "You were really insufferable", he teased.

"So you're telling me our whole rivalry started because of your big fat gay crush on me?", I stated more than asked. "You are gonna use that against me, aren't you?", he groaned. "Yeah, I am", I snickered. It was turning dark outside, but neither of us made a move. A silence fell between us, before I whispered: "I won't fully understand what you have gone through, but I can understand feeling guilty towards your parents." Will stroked my hair. "I know it's a sensitive topic, you don't have to talk about it", he said. "No, if it's okay with you, I would like to. I haven't talked about this with anyone, not even Cole. But I trust you, and I think you should know this about me. But only if you want to. I don't want to traumadump on you or something", I said. "No, no", Will kept stroking my hair and holding me. "I want to know everything about you", he said. I nodded. "Okay, then I'll tell you."