𝗺𝐲 𝐟𝗼𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 - 𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐲 ✔️

𝗲𝗽𝗶𝗹𝗼𝗾𝘂𝗲.

𝗔𝘀𝗵𝘀 𝗽𝗼𝘃-

I was sitting in my bed mentally exhausted, it's been almost a entire month without aurora being here.

I hadn't been eating much lately, just thought it was useless.

Out of nowhere fez came in my room,

𝗙𝗲𝘇: Are you gonna eat?

Fez said caring ly.

𝗔𝘀𝗵: I'm good thanks though

I nodded at him.

He left the room disappointed,

It's so different and devastating without aurora, now that she's gone there's no reason to be here.

She was everything to me just a smile from her she could light up a room, but gia took that away.

I haven't spoken to Gia after the accident.

Why would I?

Auroras friends been looking out for me, especially Liam.

Me and Him are friends now, that's good I guess.

I stood up from my bed and started slowly walking towards the mirror.

I immediately saw my skinny stomach, I was all bones from the stomach.

I felt guilty, and grossed out.

I touched my stomach softly in disgust, all I could feel is slight bones.

How come I live like this? Why do I do this type of shit to myself?

If I am then why I'm I still here, there's no point of doing this if I'm letting myself not eat or at least eat a full meal for a full entire month.

I felt cold tears starting to form in my eyes.

Aurora has brought me many things that I ever could wish, if she was still here I would give her the world.

I wish that I thanked her for bringing Happiness, Laughs, Excitement, Being happy for the next morning knowing she's the first person you'll see.

I never knew how important she is until I got to know her.

Now that changed.

My thoughts got to me, I went over to my closet and opened up a black plastic box that was covered tightly.

I grabbed a couple packets that would actually do the thing.

I hesitated for a moment, aurora would not be proud of this.

but I'm doing it anyway, I couldn't bare living like this when I could do it now just to see her.

I walked to the bathroom and closed the door so no one could come in, I went ahead and sat down on the tiled floor.

I opened the packets gently, I grabbed a couple pills and carefully put them on my palm.

I got nervous and scared, but it's worth it to see aurora again, to look at her and apologize for everything I did and importantly look at her knowing she's somewhere safe.

I popped the fentanyl pills into my mouth, it took a couple minutes for the moment I was waiting for.

everything went quiet, the world was turning.

I felt everything go slow but still feel my surroundings.

The cold floor, my aching body and eyes.