The Broken Girl

No Longer Happy Girl.

Heyyyy guys enjoy the chapter!!! The song I listened to while writing this was Losing your Memory By Ryan Star.

Demi's Pov

Sadly the two days went quickly but it's okay because Derek gave me his number. Ahhh, yesss hehe I'm soooo happy!!!

I haven't heard from Austin which is good because I'm through caring for someone who just doesn't care for girls.... but I kinda miss him. No I refuse to think like this, he's gone, I've met someone else he's nice and sweet, I don't need Austin.

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When I got home my parents were drunk...... as always. They hit me a few times before I run off to my room. Why won't anyone love me? Am I really that bad of a person? I never mean to be a bad person.

I looked into my full length mirror and I never see that happy girl I once was, I'm just a girl who masks herself with the whole "I don't care" act but underneath full of heartbreak, problems and just...... broken. I use to be happy and a great girl until my dad lost his job, my parents started drinking and doing drugs but I don't question how they get money, I just keep my head down and take whatever beating they throw at me. 

I started cutting when I was 11, at first it was just a little I never wanted to die or do too many, but as time went on it got worse and then I tried killing myself almost every night with pills, but all it did was land me into hospital. Worst part of my whole past is when I got diagnosed with bipolar, I know what that is but I never thought I'd have it, I mean I know my emotions are all over the place some of the time, but....... bipolar? That's just hard for me to accept, I can't even say it out loud.

I eventually stopped looking in the mirror and went and got changed into some mini shorts and a black tank top and got into bed.

I just laid there, staring up at the ceiling. This is the first time in a while I've been able to just lie down and think, so much has happened recently and I just want to slow everything down and take one step at a time, and not worry that it's going to cause a load of drama that is too much for me and my head to handle.

Taylor and Selena invited me to go out but I just told them I was still recovering, but in reality I'm just not in the mood to talk or move or even act happy, just not today.

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The school gave me a week off and I took it. It's better then facing up to the world right now.

I spent the time reflecting on my life and how different things are, but also what I want to do about Austin.

I decided to just stay away from Austin and Chelsea and anyone else who will cause me drama because honestly I'm barely holding on.

I called Derek a few times and he made me laugh and just happy, Derek is a good friend and right now that's all I need.