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Word Count: 1643 Song: babydoll - ari abdul
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- body dysmorphia - depression - sexual situations
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I changed into my bathing suit so Sanzu and I could sit by the pool and relax. I started to have trouble tying my bathing suit and became agitated.
I held my fingers to my temples to try and relax myself. I looked in the mirror and scanned my entire body. Scars everywhere, i looked like I had gained a fuck ton of weight. I felt sick to my stomach looking at myself.
"Baby are you ready?" Sanzu asked peering his head into the bathroom only to find me sitting on the floor crying. "Hey what's wrong?" He asked sitting beside me criss cross.
"I look fucking disgusting" I said through my tears.
Sanzu's POV
"I look fucking disgusting" She said covering her face with her hands.
My heart sunk hearing her words. "Stop being such a cry baby, you look fine" I said trying to comfort her. Fuck that sounded terrible. Why can't I ever find the right words.
"Get out" She mumbled.
"I-"
"GET OUT!" She shouted.
I did as told, I've found it best to listen to her when she wants space. I walked out of the bathroom and shut the door behind me.
I wish she could see herself through my eyes. I walked to the pool where the older Haitani was sun bathing on the hot concrete next to the pool.
"How is your back not burning?" I asked him.
He shrugged his shoulders, eyes hidden behind his sunglasses. "It's summer time bitch boy, gotta do what I gotta do"
I put my foot to his side and kicked him over into the pool. Rindou was inside of a pool float, dangling over the side laughing at his brother.
"Fuck are you laughing at" I asked him, he simply flipped me off.
I walked to the chairs and sat beside Koko and Takeomi who were playing a card game. Takeomi with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth.
