"Don't you be holding back, don't
you know holding back is impossible, when something you
feel is natural"
-Dvsn— You Do
UKHONA MTHEMBU
When Kevin Hart said there's false reality and real reality, he was right even though I don't know what that mean. But I am hundred percent sure that I fall under the real reality. My life is nothing like Netflix movies. Nothing like drooling over that girl they called ugly and boring just because she did her hair and now looks different. And she catwalks flipping her hair, everything going on slow motion. Nah!
I mean, don't these butt length freshly braided box braids makes a difference? Not that I did it for them but a stunned look from a strange would have been the greatest compliment. My hope rises when Sihle squeals a "Oh my word! My babe looks pretty", during breaktime. She last saw me on Friday of course during that "crying in the club" situation.
Even though my day began very well, with my mother driving me to school, my spirit so high. As soon as I entered the school gate, it just dissipated in the air like a smoke. I remembered that I am not important to these people, that I can only be myself when I am with my mother, behind the walls of her flat and the thin metal of her car. I remembered that no matter what I do, it will never be enough to them.
Sihle asks if I am okay.
"Yeah, I am just not in my best mood today", is what I say. "And I don't know why," I add.
"About what happened on Friday...", she trails off.
"I'm sorry for ruining the party. " I cut in.
"I wanted to apologize for Yaya's behavior", she says.
Oh!
"Yeah, she's not always like that. I don't know what was wrong with her that night, I'm sorry," Liam adds.
I'm used to it, they don't have to worry about me. I just happen to overreact because of some stupid expectations. Indeed it's "no expectations no disappointments".
________________________
"Tomorrow babes", Sihle says over the sound of the heavy rain that is loudly and heavily hitting our umbrellas and the paved surface, waving her hand at me before walking to Malum'Dingz's car, her chauffeur.
"Are you sure to don't need a ride? The rain is pretty bad"
"I'll be fine."
"Khona", a voice says behind me and there's only one person who calls me that except for my mother. This guy is Godsent, angifuni ukungasho. My heart thunders in my chest, I really did not expect him. I open my mouth to speak as I turn to his direction but I'm interrupted.
"Oh my word! It's S-Kay!"
"What's he here for?"
"But then the guy is hot, I don't want to lie."
Who the hell is S-Kay vele? Maybe it's some local celebrities or something like that but who cares about celebrities in this weather?
I'm such a hypocrite because my eyes try to look for that S-Kay, I don't want to miss out just in case they talk about it tomorrow in class. I must know the person they're gossiping about to imagine clear visions. They're looking in our direction but these kids always look at me like I'm too different so whatever.
"Nathi?", I finally say. He's there, in his glory. I don't know if he looks so good in that black jeans and turtle neck and a blue denim jacket or I'm just being my-overreacting-self. But I know I it is not the right thing to do and very dangerous as well. In fact, I need to get that stupid thought out of my head. 'Not when you still get heated when he looks at you.' The voice inside me reminds me. God!
YOU ARE READING
The Two Of Us
Mystery / ThrillerSometimes the truth you are looking for is not the truth you want to hear and live with. A 17-year-old Ukhona Mthembu becomes a victim of the consequences of her mother's past decisions and mistakes. She's dying to find out who she really is becaus...
