GUILTY | CONRAD FISHER

happy forth!

Erik Haden and Francis Edwards had known each other since the day one. Living next to each other, going to the same school, then university, even the first workplace they used to share. The both of the bestest friends had bought houses on the same street, got married and had kids who were meant to become the younger version of themselves. Literal fairytale.

When Erik's wife, Theo's mother, had broken up with him and left the state, the two of Hadens had started to visit their friends particularly often. Judith became the real mother figure for Theo, when at school he was asked about parents, he used to answer that he had the three of them: Erik, Francis and Judith. After a couple of these performances, older Edwards and Haden had to explain the school administration their whole family situation.

For Sara, Erik was a special figure, too. He turned out to be the person she discussed her sexuality with, for the first time. The girl was only eight, she had no idea that people could feel anything besides sadness or happiness. Odd feelings she had towards her classmate, the girl who was sitting right next to her in the class were scary, undeveloped and caused so much questions in the girlish head.

That day, when Sara heard someone's conversation that what she felt was wrong, she asked Erik about it wheh it turned out to be his turn to pick her up from the classes. "One person can't feel all that at once, they'd explode."

Haden laughed at her words, then he carefully squeezed her shoulder, looking directly into Edwards girl's eyes. "You're not wrong, and it's okay to feel what you feel, darling," he had always called her that way. She was fond of it, at the same time, girl hadn't let anyone but Erik call her 'darling'. "I swear, you won't explode. Not on my watch."

News about Erik's sickness was the worst Christmas present the family had ever got. Winter holidays the five of them spent in the hospital, trying to act normal, to make Erik feel normal, to feel healthy. Of course, it didn't work, because nothing seemed normal anymore.

The pair of teens had shut down for some time, they hadn't talk to any of their friends during the winter break. But, as soon as the school started, they made themselves act cool. However, every single day after the lessons ended, they came to the hospital and spent hours with Erik who was fading on their eyes. Francis and Judith wanted to tell children to visit the man less often but couldn't, they kept going there with them from day to day.

The final point appeared on their route during the pretty much ordinary day. Theo and Sara were going to hospital by Francis' car, they took a book from Erik's library to lastly finish reading it to him. Nobody remembered why kids started doing that but it looked like the older Haden loved the tradition, so, nobody dared to stop it.

But Theo, the boy who was trying to be the most optimistic from all over the family, had an odd, frightening presentiment. He felt like his father wasn't going to know the ending of the book. Not on the same side as them. Theo told nothing to his friend. Actually, it wasn't nessecery. Doctors and Sara's parents were waiting for them upstairs.

Teens looked at each other in realization before adults could say a word. "We didn't say goodbye," Sara said.

"You told him yesterday, dear," Judith responded looking how the tears were covering her daughter's cheeks.

"That's the point. We didn't."

"This is not goodbye, we have a few chapters left," Theo repeated last words they said to Erik, as it turned out, last words ever.

Since that cold April day, they had never been the same. Sara kept wearing the ring Erik got her for her birthday, three weeks before he passed, on the first of April. She remembered perfectly what he had said to her.