"Am I a bad person?"
I remember you asked me this question not just once. Never had the idea at that time why you asked me such a thing but when I looked at how your eyes were saddened by that thought, from there I knew that this thought has been bothering you since then. I took a pause, thinking what words to say. I don't know you personally, but we've been communicating every day and I feel like you've introduced your soul to me already. But hmm... Maybe this is too much to say, cuz you've only introduced the surface of your personality. I do not know you deeply.
I know you have that temper. You have the attitude that only a few could understand, and I guess I'm one of those few. Others may find your behavior rude, but I think you're just reacting to every situation. It's just that your actions are beyond their expectations. But having that behavior of yours doesn't make you less of a human. You're just being you, and I can see nothing wrong with that. We're all distinct.
It's actually mature of you to respond silence when someone triggers your demons. If being silent is the key to your peace and preventing someone from getting hurt, then so be it. Others may find it rude, but I know you're just protecting your peace. You may not say it but I know all you want is to be understood.
There's such kindness in you that maybe you don't realize. Others may find you a bad person, but some don't. Always remember that we can never be everyone's cup of tea. But trust me, if you were a tea, you'd be my favorite flavor. I'd willingly grab you in a day, twice or thrice. I'll slowly take my time in front of my veranda having you till all the bubbles in my head pop.
(May 25, 2022)
