I Dream of Black Roses

Chapter 6

It's not fair. Nothing is fair. Good people shouldn't have to deal with this. He doesn't deserve any of this.
I'm skipping school today, I just can't face Ethan after what happened. He should be fine without me, they won't bug him if I'm not there, he didn't do anything to them, they hate him because they hate me. I walk around town all day wondering if Ethan noticed I'm not at school. I sit down on the side walk in front of the school and I just sit there and stare at it. I don't understand why we are stuck in that prison. Sure, I understand we go there to learn but it's not just about learning, it's about seeing how much you can be an asshole to the rest of the students. Of course, I've always been treated like shit there, I don't know why everyone hates me so much, I mean don't get me wrong, I hate myself but I don't know why everyone else does.
The bell rings and people start walking out of the doors towards the bus and their cars and the side walk. Ethan sees me and starts walking over to me. As he gets closer I notice that he has bruises on his arms and on his face. "Are you okay?!" I say running at him
"I'm fine" he says smiling and holding me close to him
"I'm so sorry, I thought if I wasn't there they would leave you alone" I say starting to cry
"It's not your fault, you don't need to apologize" he says still hugging me
"I just can't believe all of the stuff that's happening, it's crazy and none of it is fair"
"I know, but we can get through this"
"This god damn place, I wish we could just run away"
"One day...one day"
We go to the tree and sit and talk. Though he told me it's not my fault I know it is. I hate myself so much for getting him into this. I start crying without even noticing
"What's wrong?" He ask looking up at me
"Nothing, it's just...nothing" I say wiping my tears with my sleeves
"Seriously, tell me, what's wrong? I didn't do anything did I?"
"That's exactly it, you didn't do anything, you don't deserve any of this shit. It's my fault they hate you, if it wasn't for me they would leave you alone" I say resting my head on my hand
"I told you it's not your fault. If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't be in love right now" he smiles at me and reaches for my hand
I look at him and stand up "I'm sorry, I just can't do this, I can't ruin your life even more" I say walking away
"Wait-"
"I just can't, I'm sorry"
I run home and go to my room. I lay down on my bed and stare at the ceiling.
"I just wanna die! Just kill me! Please!" I say crying into my pillow