Toxic

Chapter 47

{Katherine pov}

I woke up with a major headache I sat up slowly and looked around....im in jahseh room in his bed

I looked and seen I was still dressed that's a good sign

I looked next to me and saw him sleeping, he looked so cute in his sleep I took a picture and laughed to myself I moved his dreads and kissed his forehead

I got out his bed and walked out the door closing it then going out the front door to my car
——
Home

I just got dressed and out the shower I'm working on a new outfit for heart break city clothing line....

I have been working for a few hours and it's 11:45am already time goes fast when u have nothing to do but work...or when your broken

Every day seems like a big loop...my door bell ringed and I stopped what I was doing and walked downstairs to the door and opened it revealing jahseh

"Good morning, I brought food"he said holding up the IHOP bag I smiled and let him come in

"Good morning to you too"I said and we walked in the kitchen and sat down he took out the food and gave me mines and he sat his in front of him I opened mines to 3 pancakes with whipped cream and strawberries with syrup and sugar powder with fruit bowl and eggs and bacon

I looked and seen he got a steak I laughed a bit

"Really? A steak for breakfast"I said he smiled

"Yea I mean they steak be good as fuck"he said eating a piece I ate some of mines and I seen him put the meat on a fork and he put it to my mouth

"Just try it"he said looking at me I smiled and ate it

It's actually good as fuck lol

"Good shit right"he said and i nodded

"Yea, u want sum of mines"I asked him

"Nah it's gonna throw my steak taste off"he said I just laughed

"I know we've been spending a lot of time lately but honestly how you feeling"he asked me

"I mean I feel like I'm done healing..and crying about it I let it go actually but..I don't know it's like now I got a void in my chest a big whole...something ever hurt u so much mentally that u start to feel your actually heart and chest hurt...."I asked him

"Yea trust me I know....it still happens to me but moving on will set u free....and I think you both did the right thing"he told me

"Then why does it still hurt so much"I asked honestly

"Why do I still feel pain"I asked him He stopped eating and scooted towards me

"Hey, look at me"he said said grabbing my face gently lifting it Making me give him eye contact

"It hurts to stay just as much as it hurts to walk away, you know when I seen you that day at the model show....I was looking at you the whole time I wanted to shoot my move but I knew I'd only need up hurting you in the end....but then I helped you got to know you and your daughter Bailey and you got to know us I was so broken over Geneva I shut down myself I was already a villain but that made me a worser  villain and I had no problem being the villain but then I met you in a way your like my medicine....being around you keeps me calm in a nice state of mind...you taught me that it's okay to lean on someone's shoulder even when we don't want to but know we need to..."he told me and I smiled a bit he's right

"Thank you for being there for me, honestly I don't know what I would do with you and ski or Tasha"I told him and he hugged me

"You'll be just fine"he said and we finished eating
——-
I was talking to Tasha me ski and x were all out at the park

Smoking it was fun taking a break from work enjoying myself I watched as x and this random girl flirted with each other.....why does this make me the littlest bit of annoyed....

It's not like we go out or talk or anything like that...we just have moments
/flashback \

6 months ago....

I laying next to x we were at my moms house Bailey was gone with my mom to go shopping so it was just us here

We were looking at tv he. Laughed I just looked at him he's a special person to me right now in my life he's been coming with me to therapy and helping me when I have my mental breakdowns   I had one an 2 hours ago....that's why my mom too Bailey shopping she didn't want her to see me like that and she called x and he came to my aid

"What is it something on my face"he asked I snapped out of my thoughts he was looking dead at me I didn't even notice

"N-no I'm sorry I-

"Katherine calm down your okay I don't mind I like when you look at me"he said and I blushed a little bit

"What's on your mind"he asked me

"Honestly a lot but at the moment just you"I told him he looked me deep in my eyes I moved in and kissed him he kissed me back gently his lips were soft like baby skin his tongue danced with mines he got on top of me and kissed down my neck sucking on it this moment was filled with lust

I took off my pants and he stopped

"Are you sure"he asked me I nodded

"Yea"I said and he took them off for me and took his off we went down and started eating me out I moaned

"Mmmm"I moaned he was doing everything right the way his tongue licked my clit he sucked on it felt great amazing actually

My legs started shaking I felt my orgasm coming I gripped his dreads and came in his mouth but he licked me clean then he came up to kiss me

"You ready"he said and I nodded

He put himself in me all of him slowly he's about a good 8 inches,he started going faster while sucking my tittie

"Oh my godddd"I moaned out loud in pleasure

"Shiiiiiit"he moaned in my ear making me more wet then he flipped me over and started giving me back shots but this time faster my legs started shaking and I came again I felt him pull out and cum on my back then went back in he pulled me up by the neck

"I'm not done yet baby"he said as he went faster I was trying to catch my breathe

This felt amazing so much lust in the air....but yet this didn't feel like just sex it felt deeper then that....
/flashback over \

That moment was....great but I still think the way he was fucking me he was making love to me in a way...or maybe that's just what I want it to be

Have I become delusional?maybe do I care? No , but I can't get to lost in a thought because those nice moments me and him have are temporary... that's was the only time we did something like that it hasn't happened since and nothings been weird between us.....I just try not to get attached because everyone leaves

You just never know when....other times he just took me out I don't know if they were dates or what but I know the days we spend are special I feel the connection...I honestly don't know what are friendship or what ever is...all I know is I won't let him hurt me....I won't be blind this time......