How Did We Get Here?

After Party

Travis' POV - TW Self Harm

Holy shit, not only did I get my first blowjob, by a man nonetheless, it was Sally Face! Holy shit, he is going to tell everyone. Fuck, my dad is going to find out! "Fuck." I say quietly while walking home, no way was I staying at that party another second. Why did it have to be that freak of all people! I was supposed to not see anyone I know, I thought if I made out with a man, it would make me stop having these sinful thoughts, I'm not supposed to be gay, it's a sin!

I make my way to my room, my mom was passed out on the couch, probably drunk too. I changed out of my costume once I got to my room, and I looked at myself in the mirror on the wall, disgusting, I am a disgusting faggot. What is wrong with me, I kissed a boy, I made out with Sal Fisher, I let Sal Fisher give me a blowjob, and I enjoyed it. I'm a sinner, I need to pay for my sins. I walk over to my bedside table and pull out a pocket knife that my father gave me one time when we went camping.  I left my room and went to the bathroom, I locked my room once in there and sat in the bathtub, I opened the pocket knife and admired the blade, yes, this will show God that I am sorry, this will help me repent.

I place the blade on my inner thigh and slowly push until I see red, then I begin dragging across a few inches, I must do one for every thought, every kiss, every moan. By the end there were twenty-one cuts, I would have kept going, but I ran out of space. I grab the bandage wrap that was in the drawer and begin wrapping up my thigh to stop the bleeding. After I get out of the tub I turn it on for a moment to wash away the blood, then I head to my bed to sleep for the night. 

Sally Face's POV

I sat on the floor of the bathroom for a while, I am not sure how long. I just couldn't believe that my worst fear came true, I was terrified that if I made out with someone, they would see my face and freak out. It was Travis too, he is just going to bully me more. I started crying, I cried for a while, but eventually, Todd knocked on the door, he was searching for me. "What the hell man, we've been looking everywhere for... you, are you okay?" He asked once he noticed my sniffles.

"I'm fine, I just am drunk." I said weakly, but he just looked at me, Todd may be nerdy but he knows when something is wrong, I sighed "I was making out with a guy, we had the lights off, but he turned them on. When he saw my face, he freaked out and took off." I said quickly, I wouldn't dare say it was Travis, not only would he kill me, but then I would have to admit that I gave Travis Phelps a blowjob.

"Shit, Sal, I-I'm sorry, that must suck. Let's get you home." Todd said slowly, he was trying to think of how to help. He slowly helped me off the floor and we made our way to Niel's car where everyone else was. By the time we got there I was able to act as if nothing happened, Todd didn't say anything either, I knew he wouldn't say anything unless I did. We all split up once we got to the apartments, Niel and Ash stayed in the car so Niel could drive Ash home and then go home himself, and Larry, Todd, and I went to our separate apartments. Not too much later though Todd started messaging me to make sure I was okay, he ended up falling asleep texting me which left me by myself.

I started looking on Instagram, I typed Travis' name on the search bar but got no result, I tried again on Snapchat and the same thing, finally I tried FaceBook, and found him, his profile picture was of him and his mom and dad, he was only slightly smiling and was dressed in what looked like church clothing. I tried to see what he has posted, but it was all private. I don't even know what I was expecting, he is just some confused religious kid, of course, he isn't going to have anything on his account. I put my phone down and looked at the vape on my bedside table. I took a few puffs before turning off the light and calling it a night.

Sunday

I woke up to my dad coughing, he coughs so loud, he sneezes loud too, it's insane. I got up and took a piss before getting breakfast even though it was noon. I spent all of yesterday just recovering from my hangover and thinking of Travis. There was no way I was leaving the apartment in the state I was in, I puked most of the morning and slept during the afternoon. 

I got dressed after I finished eating and picked up my skateboard, the gang and I usually hang out at the skatepark during the weekends, it is a nice way to get out of the apartments, plus I like to skate, Larry taught me how to skate last year, and I fell in love. The only bad part about the skate park was that it was right next to the Phelps Ministry, which was probably somewhere I wouldn't want to be caught dead by, but I had to get out of my room. 

I put some headphones on as I started making my way there, it was only a ten-minute walk, but I still rode my skateboard there to make it faster. I probably shouldn't have because over I ended up tripping on a pebble and flying off my skateboard, just my luck. I just picked myself up and walked the rest of the way. 

By the time I got there the church bells rang to signify the end of the sermon, I tried to sound it out with my headphones, but I could still hear it. Eventually, people started flooding out of the church, and even though I shouldn't have I looked for Travis. Of course, I found him walking out with his family, I wasn't sure if he was gonna see me, or even remember the other night, but we locked eyes, and as soon as we did he looked away. He remembered.