Dream (Taehyung FF) - ON HOLD

Chapter 1

I sit in the living room, together with nine trainees. We're looking at our manager, Kim Taeri, who's standing in front of us, and she's talking with our three teachers.

I gulp down my saliva. I'm so nervous. They're going to kick out three of us to shortlist the members to seven to bring us to Hybe Building for further training.

My name is Y/N. I am a foreigner. I've been training in Hybe for 6 years. I am 21 years old this year. Obviously, this is my last chance to debut. I'm getting older, they don't really debut a girl over 21.

I have trained twice to debut with their two previous girl groups, but I have failed all. This time is really my last chance. I pray to God to be on my side this time.

I have spent all my 6 years here in training. My education is only at the secondary level, and my grades aren't good at all. I don't care about that because I want to be an idol so badly.

This girl group project will be debuted as Raina, which means' Queen'. The final membership will consist of five people.

My current position is...

I'm not sure. To be honest, I feel I'm the most talentless among my trainee members.

I'm trained to be a lead dancer and lead vocal. And I'm the eldest here.

Gayoon holds my hands. She is sitting next to me. I notice her hand is trembling. I shift my eyes from my hand to her face. She looks so damn pale.

Gayoon is my closest member. My best friend, actually. She got here 3 years later than me, and she's two years younger than me. But we made a best friend together.

She's just a very kind person. She helps me going through my insecurities.

Of course, I have a lot of insecurities. I was trained for six years, throwing out my education just to debut, but the girl with one year of training debuted first.

I don't blame her. Because it's about talent. I'm just feeling insecure.

I hold Gayoon's hand and nod at her to gesture for her to be strong.

I can't even talk at this time because I'm nervous too.

"Okay girls, we've made the list," says Taeri to get the members' attention.

I look up at her. My heart beats louder. Will my name be there? In the file that she's holding

"First of all, you all are doing well. To be honest, it's hard to shortlist the members because I think everyone here deserves to debut. But the project is to debut a five-member group. At this stage, we will shortlist the members into 7 groups first. Sadly, we have to.. hmm.. three members have to leave," says Aerin.

All the girls look sad. Me too. Whether I'm on the list or not, I just feel sad for everyone. We all work hard. It's just sad to imagine anyone leaving. Worst of all, if it is my own self.

"I have discussed with your three teachers, Ms. Dayoung, Ms. Sewon, and Ms. Nari, about the list. So, I will call the members' names".

My heart beats violently. Sometimes I feel confident and sometimes I feel insecure. I don't know... I just don't know.

"But.. I, as your manager, want you to know that you are all doing well. If you fail here, please know that your future may not be here, but there's a lot outside there. Keep doing well. I say this to everyone, to keep doing well".

I nod and look at her seriously. To be honest, I don't want to hear the comfort words. I'm just too nervous.

She flips her file backward and forward, then she stops at one page.

I can't look at that because she's standing, but the trainees are sitting with hopeful eyes.

"So, the names that make it to the list are... Sunhee."

I turn my head to the back when Sunhee screams out of joy. She is hugging Eunah, her closest member, and burying her face in her shoulder.

Good for her. And I already expected her to make it onto the list. She's always outshining everyone. She even made an appearance in the BTS music video. I can say her debut day is guaranteed. Her position is as the main visual and the centre. Of course, she'll be on the list.

"Eunah," continues Taeri.

Eunah gasps, and those two, both friends, look so damn happy. Good for them.

Eunah's position is as the main rapper and lead dancer.

"Aeri"

Aeri is the main vocalist and for visuals too. I can't lie that she's really beautiful.

"Jihyo" Taeri continues to read the list.

Jihyo's position is as the lead vocalist.

I'm so nervous because four names have been called out and there are only three spots left.

I wish it would be Gayoon and me. I close my eyes and pray for it.

"Woohee, Lucy"

I hear the joyful scream. This time, I can't be happy for anyone. It's already saddening me because there's only one place left.

I look at Gayoon. I can see she's about to cry.

I tighten my grip on Gayoon's hand.

"The last person on the list is..." Taeri pauses, and her eyes lock onto mine.

"Y/n," she says.

My facial muscles freeze. I don't know how to feel.

Should I be happy? Should I be sad?

Gayoon.

Gayoon pulls her hand off of me, then she buries her face with her two hands.

She's sobbing.

I feel so bad. I know I should be happy because I need to be on the list, but I can't be happy.

I hug Gayoon and pull her head onto my shoulder. "I'm sorry, Gayoon," I say, and tears also drop from my eyes.

I have been in her place two times and I know what it feels like.

She works so hard. Everyday sleep deprivation just to be eliminated in this manner.

The world is cruel, but this is the risk of being a trainee.

"I'm sorry Gayoon, Min, and Jessica, that you guys have to leave.. By this week. Don't lose hope, you guys are still young" says Taeri.

"Tonight, there will be no practice. Those who make the list will begin training in Hybe Building the following week. There will be a lot of new teachers to teach you. and new things to learn. Rules, manners, and all. That's all, I think. You guys are free to go out tonight. Drinks for those of legal drinking age, or do whatever you want. But keep your image good, okay? You dont want to get into trouble, you know?"

"Yes", I say slowly.