Barely Holding On [H.S]

Thirteen

Addie's POV:

"I want to fuck you."

Harry's low, quiet voice whispered right next to my ear. I felt a set of chills rake over my body. I opened my mouth to try and speak, but I couldn't find the words. I know I'm meant to say yes, but how could I? I don't want to lose my virginity to a man I have no feelings for. I'd always thought I'd have my first time with someone I loved, I'd definitely never expected it to be with someone I hated.

"Well, love, what'll it be?" He asked, his first words sweet but his tone bitter. "You either go through with it, or leave Ed to die in the middle of nowhere."

"I-I- I don't know." I stuttered. If I was brave, I would choose to save Ed in a heartbeat. But this type of brave gesture also meant letting walls crumble that I'd spent days of tireless work building. I knew in my mind that saving Ed was the right thing to do, but how could I go through with... with sleeping with Harry?

"Well fine then," he continued after I didn't speak for a while. "I'll give you until we find Ed to choose. If by then you don't agree to our little deal, then we'll just shoot him between the eyes and leave him for the animals to finish off. Or maybe we could just stab him and leave him to bleed out. However, if you do agree, I get to 'take my prize,'" He paused to make quick air quotes as he said this. "My time and place of choice."

"Can't we just come up with something else? Anything?" I pleaded.

"And what might that be, miss Addie?" He looked out the window as he spoke.

"Well, I could... I don't know, basically anything else." I begged.

"Okay, then if you can't give me any other options, we'll just have to stick with mine." He smirked, turning to join the rest of the boys.

"Please?" I choked out. I was barely holding back tears.

"You have thirty seconds to think of something. Go." He turned back around.

"Well, I could help out? Make your meals, clean, anything." I suggested.

"Your asking to be my maid?" He turned back to me, amused.

"Uh, I guess so, yeah. I mean, if you put it that way." I stuttered.

"Not good enough. Times up, you have about an hour until we arrive back near the arena, think of your decision about our deal, got it?" He opened the door and left.

Holy shit. I thought to myself. The decision should be simple. If I really care about Ed, then I pick sex with Harry. But it's not. It's harder than that. I would be losing my virginity to a man that is undoubtedly my most hated man on earth.

And on top of that, it would also be about my dignity. I know it's selfish, but it's basically all I have left. That leaves me with the question. Would Ed be a fair trade for my dignity?

Yes, yes he would. I decided. It was a scary decision, and I know that he wouldn't want me to give up this for him, but I think he's worth it. All that he's done for me, it's a definite choice.

I have to sleep with Harry.

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Zayyyynnnn noooooo! :'(((

I just want to say that I will miss Zayn being a member of One Direction officially, but in or hearts, he will still always be a member.

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Byee:*