izuku in arcane

it doesn't matter

Jinx point of view

My friends pin me to the floor, each one of them with a lifeless expression voices in my head come back screaming at me what the hell is going on what's happening!! It feels like my head is splitting apart what's happening!

Me or is that toga: we know all about your tragic little past, how are you murdered your entire family well you're a new one anyway so we had one of our friends sceptic make life-size dolls of your description have to say those little dollies you made in your little hideout really helped with the design. What do you think life like are they?

I can't respond my brain feels like it's going to explode the voices keep coming back! It's so painful I feel hot I feel cold I feel like I'm gonna vomit. Tears escaped my eyes as I look in the shallow eyes of Milo looks down at me holding my arms down

Me no no no wait that's toga isn't it?!: wow you really are not taking this so well, yes but in all fairness it's your fault I mean what was it that Milo said about you are... a jinx!

That word extends my head into a deeper spiral I feel like I'm going even more insane the voices yelling scream calling me the same thing as the monsters come back and I see them in my head and I can't take this anymore it's killing me!!!

The other me: oh seems like you don't like being called that yet you named yourself that... What did you say your name really was powder right? who names the kid powder strange but again you are one strange girl I mean I'm crazy but you are deranged at least I kill people I like because it's my way of love you kill people because it's the only thing you know how to do isn't it I mean you killed your new family and you're going to kill this one as well

The other me walks towards Caitlin, wielding a knife no no no no no no I don't like her but if she dies I'll never patch things up with my sister I've got a chance to make things right I can't lose it if I kill her that's it I'm never be able to patch things up with my sister!

But I can't stop her my brain is melting I feel my sanity slipping away, I'm left wondering who am I am I jinx or am I powder which one is it!!!??

I fade into darkness the voices stock but I'm left with this gaping hole in my chest feels like something is missing but I just don't know what it is

... this is pathetic, I should've seen this coming what did I expect I was gonna help take out the bad guys can be seen as a hero. no that's not who I am I know it isn't because I don't even know who I am so how can someone who doesn't even know where they stand know what they're supposed to be. I mean who am I truly underneath it all am I powder or am I jinx. Even I don't know the answer to that question why did I call myself that I hate the word yet I chose it as my name why was I so consciously trying to tell myself that I hate myself or is it something else whatever it doesn't matter I'm just a crazy girl I'll always be that

A Voice  i recognise echoes in my subconscious: no you're not

From the The shadows izuku fully clothed and his hero costume is in one piece again: you're not just a crazy girl

I stand up and look at him: okay what the hell is going on you were in my subconscious aren't we or am I having another delusion!?

Iuzku: well you are having another delusion goes I'm not real we are in your subconscious and just that part of your subconscious that he's trying to tell you to stop whining

I look at him: and exactly why have I chosen a boy I've only known a week

Izuku: I don't know what your subconscious maybe you've developed a bit of a crush maybe you look up to him I don't know I'm not the real him. I'm just here to tell you to stop Second guessing yourself and do something