Together: Sequel To Alone

Chapter Six | Siblings Together|

C H A P T E R 6

I forgot how much I loved Tobias's eyes. They were- are- the deepest blue I've ever seen, they extend to depths that are uncharitable. So, as I stare into his ever-thoughtful-eyes, I can't help but smile. He holds me close, my waist pressed close to his, his arms firmly clasped behind my back. We don't say anything, we only revel in each others presence, getting high off the fumes of freshly cut grass that drift from the other end if the park.

It's nice, until reality sets in. I can't stand here and loose myself in his gaze. I can't let myself get lost in his eyes. I can't fall for him again because, if I do, I know I will end up heartbroken once again and I can't let that happen. Just as the thought crosses my mind, he leans in, almost subconsciously, towards my face. On instinct, I push myself onto my toes, reaching up towards his awaiting lips, and we collide. We meet in a flurry of forgotten sparks and rekindled passion, our lips moving with one another. It's a gentle kiss, one that screams for another chance. A chance that I cannot give, I can't go back to him so easily, if I go at all.

So, I place my small hands on his muscular chest and gently move away from him, my eyes immediately shooting to he ground. My lips are warm with the recent friction as my cheeks are warm with embarrassment. If I did decide to give this a chance a few things  would need to happen. One, I would have to go through the heart wrenching process of fake breaking up with Al, maybe wallowing in my 'sorrow' for a bit to make it believable. Two, I couldn't take it so quickly, we would need to fix pur problems, find friendship again before love. Third, and most important, I would have to be whole. Though I have moved on from his departure before, he still ripped my heart to shreds, a wound from which I have still not healed. I would need to make myself me again before letting him take my other half. Because, now, if he took half of me, I would be left with less than that of what he has taken, I am not whole enough to be split apart again.

With a glance into his confused eyes, I sigh, biting the inside of my cheek. He brings his hand to caress my cheek, his thumb tracing my jaw. Though my body and mind scream for me to lean into his touch, for me to embrace him wholeheartedly, I turn my head away, looking to the grass again.

"Al" the word is choked in my mouth, coming out muted and shaky. The tears burn at my eyes, put a lump in my throat.

As if something has clicked within him, he allows an expression of sadness to dance across his features before forming his face into a mask of indifference. With a final fleeting glance in my direction, he shakes his head and stalks off, his eyes cast downwards.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

" YOU WHAT?" Christina screeches, her eyes the size of plates.

"What she said" Zeke says, shock clear in his voice.

"I kissed him" I mutter, my voice small and silent, unlike me entirely.

"Yeah we got that" Zeke says, exasperation clear in his voice " but why?"

" If I knew that, Zeke, don't you think I'd have told you?" I snap " I don't know why I kissed him. I'm so angry at that stupid useless piece of-"

"Okay, calm down there." Christina interrupts, her hands up in a calming gesture. " What exactly happened?"

"I've explained three times" I groan "we kissed, I used Al as an excuse to get him to stop, he left, I went to class, the end"

" Did you want him to stop?" Chris asks " kissing you, I mean"

"Yes...no....I don't know" I flop back into my bed, cocooning my self in the fluffy sheets. " Stupid boys. Stupid emotions. Stupid."

" I don't know what to tell you Tris" Zeke says,his eyes soft as a stray tear slips down my cheek in a smooth glide.