Care

ꪀ° 20: hurt

Being with her while I was at my worst
made me my happiest. I thought I loved before but no, this is love. I love her. She makes me happy,
and she always tells me that I make her happy.
No matter how much I hide how I truly feel on the inside, she knows that I'm not okay,
that I'm burying my miserable self 6ft under everyday so she could be happy.
She's the only person who can read me.
And I know, I'm the only person making her happy when she's sad.

Is this my chance? Is she telling me,
'we can and we will run away together?'
Is she gonna come and tell me,
'Hoseok, you're the one I want to be with.' ?

I'm waiting for you so please,

don't choose him again.

-

"I- I kissed Hoseok.." you look away, not wanting to see how upset he is. "I'm sorry." You whisper.

He takes a deep breath and tries to stay calm, "why?"

"I don't know.." you continue to whisper when you couldn't use your full voice, the cries making it hard to talk. "I guess I kind of fell for him while we spend every night together."

"No.." Taehyung shakes his head, "no.." he sniffles, "I- I won't let him take you from me." He pulls you by your arm to hug you, "stay with me– I- I won't sleep with SoYeon anymore– I don't care about her, I never did. I only love you. I know she's the reason why you're always upset at me, I know you can't stand it when she's next to me at night, talking to me or hugging me– I know y/n.." he shuts his eyes tight, the tears squeezing their way out. "I can't lose you again, I promised you I'll come back and make you my wife, I swear it now. You're the only one.... So don't leave me, don't try to leave me, don't feel like you did me wrong-"

You break the necklace off your neck, "But I can't..." you cry, "I can't stand her being near you, but... there's also Hoseok... you can't choose who you fall in love with....." you sniffle, looking down.

"No. i won't let you leave me, stay with me." He fixes the necklace around your neck again. "you're not in love with Hoseok. Not yet."

You start to over breath, "I'm not..." you repeat after him.

"See.. you still love me."

"Yea.." you hug him, "but I don't want to hurt you or Hoseok."

"But you're more scared to hurt me.. that means you love me more..."

You start to cry even more, not sure if what he's saying is true, or if he's just putting it in your head. "But I still care about Hoseok."

"I love you."

You swallow your spit, "I'm sorry."

"I forgive you.." he pulls away, looking at you. "So will you say yes?"

"I don't know...." You look down, tears falling from your eyes.

"I promise, I won't sleep with her anymore– I'll sleep here with you, I don't care about what she does from now on. Please? I'll love and take care of you, You don't have to worry about money or or anything in your life.. I promise I'll love you unconditionally and give you everything, I'll give you my all."

You cry into his chest, his words hitting you in the heart. "Okay.." you sniffle and nod, "okay."

You crawl onto his lap when he sits down on your bed. "Really?" He softly smiles.