Home Is Ours ('Home Is' Book Three - Daryl Dixon)

Chapter 5 - Ain't Nobody (Chaka Khan)

NATE

"IT'S YOUR OWN FUCKING FAULT THAT YOU LOOK LIKE SHREK!"

The pitiful yell warbles around the toothbrush in my gob.

This morning? I'm wearing the loveliest shade of 'slept like crap'. So no one can ever accuse me of even remotely resembling the 'Yummy Mummy'....as Tara now calls me.

I yank handfuls of hair on top of my head before slapping moisturiser onto my face. All the while, studiously ignoring my exhausted....and agonised reflection in the bathroom mirror.

Jeez, I thought yesterday was bad. But the pain has become almost physical and beyond indescribable.  And any second now?

I swear my chest is gonna rip open. To reveal the alien who's been merrily feasting away on my insides. Since before I departed Hilltop even.

Leo began pitching his two-cents worth into my ear....yet again.

'You'll do it, Baby Doll. You have to! Because you'll be doing it for me as well as him'  His voice echoed the order repeatedly through my head.

"Alright already! I heard you the first time, Lord Danforth. Strewth!"  I mutter in reply.

Leaving the Grimes residence after supper last night, my hand automatically rose. Stretched out  towards the carefully preserved planks that Rick cut out from their porch. They are now adorning the hallway wall.

Tapped my palm against Carl's blue-painted one, almost like a gentle high-five. Then I asked Mich....if it ever gets any easier.

Leaving them behind, that is.

"The first flight from your own little nest is by far the worst. You're feeling it, Nate. And that's Ok, it's more than normal. Once Alfie reaches his self-aware stage, though? He'll find buttons to push that you never even dreamed existed inside of you."

"THEN....you'll have a bag packed and at the ready."

She opened the cupboard under their stairs to show me her very own 'quick-getaway'  kit. It looked much-used  🫤

"PFFFFT!  Poo-Bear's already found them all and then some. But he'll grow out of it. It's just a stage, like you said....right? "

"Yeah, yeah. Of course he will. You betcha!"  Mich gave a solemn nod of agreement before smooching my forehead.

Biaaaatch!

She could've at least waited until their front door swung itself to a close on her butt? Before hysterically snorting her way into a laughing frenzy. Over my naivety....or wishful thinking rather.

Now, where was I? Oh yeah! Selfishly wallowing in Derpa's bottomless pit of self-pity, gloom, doom and despair.

"See, woman!  This is exactly what happens. When you give all those little voices in your head permission to start up their own self-help forum. And for allowing them to convince you....that going 'Poo-Bear cold turkey'  was for the best."

"Cold turkey? My ass!"

"AND NOT ONLY THAT?  You actually planned on being away from them for three whole days. Unfuckingbelievable!"

"No wonder Dixon wasn't thrilled when you told him. You should've taken baby steps, just like Alfie does. A half day here and there to start with, then a whole day after that. Overnight eventually?"

"Truly, Derpa....whoever is in charge of making sure you don't go around doing dumb shit like this? Is fucking fired! "

"And so say all of us!  Wake up on the wrong side of stupid again this morning did we, hermanita? Have you left me some hot water at least?"